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New to Anxiety Zone, Old to Hypochondria

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Offline beetlebum

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New to Anxiety Zone, Old to Hypochondria
« on: March 15, 2014, 10:56:56 PM »
Hello Everyone.

After a few years of going online and reading posts about anxiety I've finally decided to write my own.  A brief history about myself (as some of you might relate):

I was diagnosed with GAD when I was very young around 7.  It only was due to my parent's thinking I had ADHD at a young age and I was found to have Anxiety disorder, I used to faint in class, cry, throw up.  All physical symptoms that I had no clue about.  Anxiety really didn't effect me in a way I realized until I entered Middle School.  There I faced my first encounter with Hypochondria.  It all started because I was born with a heart murmur and I thought that I would have a heart problem at any moment.  And it bounced off of that, it went away for 2 years, came back.  I got psychological help but never went on medication because I was afraid (hypochondria) that I would become addicted or not be myself.  My parents helped me at the age of 16 go and get holistic help and go see a nutritionist who told me to eat a diet to help control my anxiety, by cutting out caffeine, refined sugars, and dairy. He also introduced me to meditation.  I was young and really didn't grasp these methods and went away from them. 
About 4 years ago I had a major problem in my life that led me to have a on going attack still lasting.  I moved back into my parent's house in 2010 at the age of 20 due to having a huge anxiety attack in college.  I couldn't breath in my dorm room, I couldn't eat, I was depressed, I thought I had many diseases and issues.  I decided the best thing for me would be to come home and get myself fixed.  I went back to therapy but I couldn't follow through with it because of money. I started going online looking for answers but this only led me to googling my problems.  I became an insomniac, I was eating horribly and I couldn't get my ***** together.  Since then, 4 years later my life has gotten better but I still have severe Hypochondria.  Last year I went to the ER three times thinking I had a heart attack.  I'm also deathly afraid that I'll catch AIDS from my boyfriend, or that I'll die at work because I've overworked myself.  I'm always getting headaches, I had a CT scan last year because of it and was fine.  I went to yoga for a month which I found helps but I don't have the money to do it any more.  Sometimes I watch scary television or see something on the internet and it makes me have an anxiety attack, like i'll watch a movie about something having cancer and then I'll think I have skin cancer and then go to the dermatologist, or I'll watch a scary movie and think I'll become the monster in it and hurt people.  I really don't know what to do at this point, I tell my family but they just don't know what to do for me anymore, and have givin up and just tell me to get over it.  I really wish that I wasn't like this, and I wish that I didn't have to go through anxiety every day.  Does anyone have any advice on what I should do?  What are things that could help me and make me feel like a human again?
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Offline patmob

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Re: New to Anxiety Zone, Old to Hypochondria
« Reply #1 on: March 16, 2014, 08:54:38 AM »
Sorry you are going through all of this.  The only suggestion I can make is that you said yoga made you feel better.  I know you can't afford it but check YouTube - bet you'll find lots of stuff there for free.  Won't be a class with other people but better than nothing.

This may sound stupid, but if monster movies or movies about cancer set you off then simply stop watching them.
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Offline beetlebum

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Re: New to Anxiety Zone, Old to Hypochondria
« Reply #2 on: March 16, 2014, 06:47:38 PM »
thanks pat, I think I have to give yoga another shot, and I need to stop watching Netflix so much!
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Offline anagargano

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Re: New to Anxiety Zone, Old to Hypochondria
« Reply #3 on: March 16, 2014, 07:11:26 PM »
Sorry you are going thru this.....but you are in good company here ...we all are to some extent or another.......exercise is good , yoga great try dvds or utube...any hobbies you really love seem to help ..and yes dont watch things that upset u , what for?....it goes up and down and you will feel better ...but try take care of yourself as much as you can
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