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Author Topic: Tired of an Anxiety Driven life - I Want to live FREELY  (Read 232 times)

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Offline tunnafish

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Tired of an Anxiety Driven life - I Want to live FREELY
« on: March 08, 2014, 09:47:43 PM »
Hi, I am new here, like many others I suppose.

I am sick of being scared and worried. I want to be happy and feel free - but anxiety gets me so down and depressed.

I'm having anxiety related body problems right now that are making me miserable. I am always finding something new on my body that is wrong or uncomfortable and I OBSESS over it and make myself sick. I also think the worst when it comes to my health.

I starting seeing/kind of dating a wonderful man who is loving and accepts me for the woman I am - flaws and all. He treats me like a princess - but I can't handle the relationship already. It is stressing me out and I don't know why! I'm so scared I am going to ruin the first good relationship with a man that I have ever had in my life. I can't handle it and I can't take it. My body is reacting in stress/anxiety overkill right now because I am so freaked out that I finally found a good man. I know I should be happy and relaxed but the whole relationship is moving fast and I am not used to it.

I have so many hopes and dreams for my future - but my anxiety gets in the way of everything! I want to feel healthy and happy and relaxed and loved. I want a career and a husband and a home and kids. I'm afraid none of that will ever happen for me because I simply can't handle any of it.

I also have bipolar disorder and the highs and lows of that are exhausting. I have too many thoughts in my head and I can't get them out. I can't explain my actions or why I do certain things.

I made an appointment with a psychiatrist but that is not for 3 weeks. It can't come soon enough. This is my last hope at finding some sort of "relief" in my life.

All I want to do is taking a sleeping pill and sleep for days, weeks, months. I just want relief and I am paranoid I am never going to find it. :(
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Offline Cuchculan

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Re: Tired of an Anxiety Driven life - I Want to live FREELY
« Reply #1 on: March 09, 2014, 05:54:38 AM »
Welcome to the forum. Good to have you as a member. Here you are with like minded people. People who understand. As we all suffer from something or other. So feel free to ask any questions. Our members are always willing to help others out. Good chatroom too. 3 posts to enter the room.

Find the correct section of the forum that suits your condition and create a new topic on it. This is just a welcome section. Never really get the same amount of help in this section as you would on the other sections of the forums. So whatever one suits the questions you are asking. Get much better answers.
All users of the chatroom must be 18 years old or over. The room is off limits to anybody under the age of 18.

Possibly 10 posts to enter chat at the moment.
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The Lovable Irish Rogue

Offline sunshine22

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Re: Tired of an Anxiety Driven life - I Want to live FREELY
« Reply #2 on: March 10, 2014, 04:53:55 PM »
Hi Tunnafish- cute name :)

Great that you have an appointment set up!  Three weeks can seem like a long time, but it will go by fast if you can distract yourself from thinking too much.  Get some exercise, eat well, do deep breathing, and try to spend time with friends or family who know you well.   It's also great to hear that you found someone you like, and who obviously likes you (treats you like a princess? sounds great!) and it's also understandable that you're scared that it's moving too fast.  But -if he is worth having in your life, he will be there for you through this!

I can really relate to what you've written.  I have effectively 'beaten' panic disorder, but I have so many little things I do to combat it on a daily basis that sometimes it feels like I'm not "free."  I don't know what it's like to have BP disorder, though, and that sounds like a lot to have to deal with.  However my mom had it (back then they called it manic depression) and I do know that the most important thing for her was sticking with the meds to even out the highs and lows.   I hope you're able to do that. 

And..finally..I can't say it enough...find a therapist that does Cognitive Behavioral Therapy!  This is what really helped me, and many others.   You deserve to have love and a happy family.  Be well!
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I believe that anyone can conquer fear by doing the things he fears to do, provided he keeps doing them until he gets a record of successful experience behind him. Eleanor Roosevelt