I experienced something worse than all of these stories. This is no joke and I am totally serious. This had to happen to a guy like me - a hypochondriacal germ-o-phobe.
Several months ago, I went to visit my mother in the hospital. I used a urinal toilet, at the hospital waiting room. The flushing mechanism on this thing must have been calculated for Jetstream mode. When I flushed it, the toilet water sprayed and splattered all over my face and mouth! I was totally in shock and couldn't move. Trust me. I literally washed my entire face, mouth, and tongue with the hand soap.
A doctor walked in and agreed it was pretty gross, and couldn't help laugh. He told me I'd probably be fine. That day, I must have asked every medical professional I encountered, in that hospital, for reassurance.
I think I'm fine now. But, who knows? Maybe I have a secret case of HIV.