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Author Topic: Scared to be alone with my son  (Read 419 times)

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Offline Lo213

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Scared to be alone with my son
« on: February 13, 2014, 07:21:05 AM »
My husband is about to go to work and I'm going to be home alone with my 1 yr old for the first time in months. I'm having left arm pain, left jaw pain, and sweating. We only have 1 car so I can't go anywhere. I'm absolutely terrified that I will have a heart attack and pass out and die before my husband gets back home and my son will get hurt. How can I ignore symptoms in this situation?  We used to have roommates so I felt a little safer knowing that I'd be found quickly.

I hate this so much. I used to enjoy having the house to myself. I have no family or friends nearby to call. I know that my symptoms are most likely acting up because I'm afraid of him leaving...but what if it's real this time?
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Offline Brick5711

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Re: Scared to be alone with my son
« Reply #1 on: February 13, 2014, 07:49:32 AM »
This is normal HA behaviour. I hate to go to poop unless someone is at the house cause I just know that will be the time the toilet fills with blood and I will pass out and my son wont understand. I am a stay at home mom so these thoughts plague me every day. My mother and sister come separate days to be with me and the other three days I am alone. It is scary.
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Offline famv5

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Re: Scared to be alone with my son
« Reply #2 on: February 13, 2014, 08:42:18 AM »
I feel the same way.  My husband works out of town M - TH and I'm all alone with my three kids.  I have no family or friends close by either.  My anxiety starts up full force in the evening because I worry that if I have to go to the ER what will I do with my kids?  It's such a terrible feeling.  I have to put on a brave face for them so they don't worry but inside I'm falling to pieces.

Just try to relax and maybe go for a walk outside or play with your son or just find something to occupy your mind for a bit.  The day will pass by quickly and your husband will be back home. 
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"Our anxiety does not empty tomorrow of its sorrows, but only empties today of its strengths" - Charles H. Spurgeon

Online tinam7

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Re: Scared to be alone with my son
« Reply #3 on: February 13, 2014, 08:44:40 AM »
What can we say to help you? Having the responsibility of a little one is at the root here, or so I think. I remember that worrisome time. But look at him, see how sweet he is, how he smiles at you, how interested in everything. You are his world and are there for him.

Try to forget yourself except to maybe do some meditation. Sit anywhere quietly (cushion, chair, couch, etc.) close your eyes, slowly breathe in therapeutic oxygen to your heart, all your internal organs, your precious brain. Breathe out all foolish fears. This may develop the confidence you need to care for your darling boy, appreciate him and your husband. We are here to try and support you.
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Offline marc

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Re: Scared to be alone with my son
« Reply #4 on: February 13, 2014, 08:44:57 AM »
Anxiety can be an awful thing to deal with, as I have had it off and on for over 30 years. I wish their was an
answer I could give you, but I also have trouble accepting uncertainty.
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If you're going through hell, keep going.
Never, Never, Never, give up.

Offline Lo213

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Re: Scared to be alone with my son
« Reply #5 on: February 13, 2014, 11:40:27 AM »
Thanks guys. It was bad enough when it was just me alone. Now with him it's worse because I feel like he's at risk. And I feel like I can't go to the ER if I need to.
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Online tinam7

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Re: Scared to be alone with my son
« Reply #6 on: February 13, 2014, 12:20:43 PM »
All the more reason to find your way to peace and calm and hope and wellbeing, instead of thoughts of the ER. Dreary place.

What might be some encouraging, relaxing activities? Going for a walk? Soothing music? Cooking a warming soup? Doing laundry? Cleaning? Knitting? Sewing? Reading? You probably have better ideas. Making friends with ourself is a great gift we can try and give ourself. Hoping the best for you and your little one.                             
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Offline marc

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Re: Scared to be alone with my son
« Reply #7 on: February 13, 2014, 01:06:42 PM »
My internal medicine physician told me to avoid the ER unless you have a true dire emergency.
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If you're going through hell, keep going.
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Offline Lo213

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Re: Scared to be alone with my son
« Reply #8 on: February 13, 2014, 01:58:53 PM »
I wish I could get the motivation to clean the house. I'm 11 weeks pregnant and SO tired and have all day morning sickness still. Medicaid won't pay for the new, safer, morning sickness pills so I'm stuck with Zofran which keeps me from throwing up most of the time but doesn't take away the sick feeling. 

I wish I could tell when I was really having an emergency. Of course then I wouldn't have anxiety.
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Online tinam7

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Re: Scared to be alone with my son
« Reply #9 on: February 13, 2014, 03:26:26 PM »
Remember that nausea myself but at least it usually is there only in the early weeks. You want to see about getting some help for your anxiety. A therapist might help, someone to talk to and get guidance. Maybe learn about CBT. Your ob/gyn may have some suggestions, even possibly for support groups.

When your little one naps you can also nap hopefully waking up less tired, less nauseous. There are many things to be thankful for. Maybe you can write them in a notebook not to lose sight of them. Journaling is part of CBT and can be very helpful. Also write down all that you accomplish every day. You'll be surprised how much you do despite anxiety and not feeling well. You want to praise yourself and be your own best friend. And doting friend of your little one. Just some thoughts.
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Offline Xosammy

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Re: Scared to be alone with my son
« Reply #10 on: February 13, 2014, 11:25:51 PM »
My son is three and I'm still afraid to be alone with him incase something happens. I think it's a fear we just have to unfortunately have to get over. I wish you the best momma
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Offline Lo213

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Re: Scared to be alone with my son
« Reply #11 on: February 14, 2014, 10:07:29 AM »
Now I've been up since 3:30am with horrific heart attack symptoms. I can't take it anymore. I need to go to the hospital. My elbows ache so badly, yet I have no problems moving them or even lifting my son. Sometimes the ache is also in my jaw, especially on the left side. And I'm sweating, despite how cold it is in here. I'm trying to do the Linden Method, but I don't fully believe that it's anxiety so I doubt it will work. I think it used to be anxiety but now it's real, and no one will help me because of how many times I've cried wolf. I don't blame them, but it sucks. It's valentines day and I'm afraid my husband will come home to find me dead.
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Offline Hypo84

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Re: Scared to be alone with my son
« Reply #12 on: February 14, 2014, 10:12:19 AM »
Are you taking any anti-anxiety meds or antidepressants and/or going to therapy ?
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Offline Lo213

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Re: Scared to be alone with my son
« Reply #13 on: February 14, 2014, 11:00:57 AM »
My OB will only let me take visteral and it does nothing. I've had allergic reactions to Zoloft and lexapro so she won't let me try anything while pregnant. And Medicaid won't pay for therapy. My husband and I both list our jobs and are now both only working part time so we can't afford our bills as it is.
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Online tinam7

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Re: Scared to be alone with my son
« Reply #14 on: February 14, 2014, 11:20:36 AM »
Your heart is reacting to the stress in your life. Go to the hospital and you turn into an automatic patient and invalid. This happened to a relative. Never got out of the wheel chair.

Stay home, be strong for your little boy and you have a chance. People your age do not have heart attacks. Don't know what Linden Method is but meditation can calm you. Be thankful for your husband and everyone's good health. These are indeed very hard times for many. But we can do much to help ourself. You know we wish the very best for you.
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