Im writing here because I feel like I really need someone to talk to. Someone who understands....So I turn to you guys, who can give me the best advice.
My significant other suffers with anxiety. We have been in a relationship for the past 3 years. Because I know what he is dealing with, I try my best to be patient, stay calm, be positive, supportive at all times. Even the times when I do not have the strength. I am by no means perfect, but I really try my best to be an understanding partner. I really do.
The issue is, he was diagnosed with anxiety before I knew him and was on medication for a while and then stopped. He is constantly worried about anything and everything, jobs, finance, family, friends, our relationship...just everything. I feel like he has this constant fear inside of him that something is gonna go wrong. For example, he recently got a new job. One that he wanted for years, and when he finally got the job I thought he would be happy. Instead, he was anxious that the month gap he had until starting this new job, something was going to go horribly wrong. I understand that this is a part of the illness, and honestly anyone suffering with this is soo brave because I cannot imagine how it would be to always be scared and worried.
The thing is though, when I try telling him that maybe its worth going to a doctor again, he brushes it off. He doesn't fully recognize that it is his anxiety that is acting up.
The reason why I am writing this post is, every now and then..he gets doubts about our relationship. In my point of view, we have a great relationship. We are best friends, we are intimate, we laugh together, share the joys and troubles of life, we rely on eachother, we plan our future together, we are affectionate etc. I am so in love with this person, which is why it hurts me so much when he suddenly doesn't know if we are suitable for each other.
And that is when I break, and let my emotions take over. I get scared that he will leave because he has these doubts. I mean, the doubts always go away and we continue being happy.
Its just, when those doubts come up its tears me apart and I just feel so scared. I let my emotions get to me and I kind of have a bit of an outburts which he doesnt understand. So for example, he will ask me out of the blue "do you think we are suitable for eachother". When he says stuff like that, I ask him over and over "WHY do you ask this, do you feel like we dont?" etc. And his reply willl always be "I am JUST asking your view and that is IT, nothing more"
I just want to ask you guys, is this his anxiety speaking? Because there is literally no other reason for him to be unsure of me and him. And if it is his anxiety speaking, then how in the world can I control my emotions and fears? My tears are rolling down as I am writing, all I want to do is be a good partner but sometimes it honestly tears me apart.
I would be so deeply grateful if anyone else can share a similar story or any other opinions. I really dont have anyone to talk about, as my closest friends to not understand how it is to have an illness like this and be constantly worried.
Thank you so much guys.