I've had PAD, GAD for the last 4-5 years. Pretty much the majority of my 20's I've been dealing with these issues. I'm 27 now. Why did this happen to me? I don't understand it. I've been good to others, followed all the rules, did well for myself, did well for others. Ever since the "Panic Journey" began I've been trying to figure out the cause of my problems. I've had no luck once so ever. I've had no relief from anxiety, and for the last two months I've been battling depression. I don't get a full nights sleep anymore, I get stressed WAY too fast. So fast I can't enjoy sitting down at a restaurant.
I'm at my wits end, I'm having a hard time being resilient. To top it all off I can't take medication because my phobia involves taking pills. So, I'm afraid to take any sleeping pill, or anti-depressant. I think about killing myself all the time. I don't want to leave my fiancÚ and parents destroyed so i push on for them.
I'm afraid. I don't know what else, who else to turn to. Life isn't mean to be lived this way...what's the point anymore, why suffer daily?