So, my family are not really the type to talk to each other about our feelings. So my sister told me that my dad thinks I am depressed. So, I lied to my sister and said 'How pathetic is that? I'm not depressed'. I only did this because she is my younger sister and I am the one who really has brought her up. I told her to tell my dad to talk to me. But she said that he is apparently too scared to talk to me, but he didn't exactly explain why. I mean, I know can be really irritable and I have a few problems with my anger; but how can my own dad be afraid to talk to me? Me and my dad used to be very close when I was younger, but we haven't got along for about 6 years. I suppose maybe I subconsciously blame him for what his father did to me as a child; despite my memory of this being very vague. My sister has told me that even my mum has said that she thinks I'm depressed. So if both of my parents think this, why don't they talk to me, because no matter how hard I try, I cannot find the words to tell anyone how I really feel. It's like an invisible barrier that stops me from talking about my feelings and this is supposed to be the year that I sort out my messed up life.
Everything and everyone around me is changing and moving on with their lives. And I am stuck.