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Author Topic: Need some advice.  (Read 272 times)

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Offline XOTWOD

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Need some advice.
« on: January 10, 2014, 04:46:07 PM »
So basically, I have come to a point in my life where I feel ready to open up about how I really feel. I wanted to tell my mother so, I have been plucking up the courage to tell her about how I am depressed, suffer from anxiety and self-harm. Then on Christmas day, she was told by some relatives that my cousin self-harms and is depressed. My sister also heard about this too. I thought this might be good to hear how they react towards this situation, and might allow me to open up to my mum and sister. However, my mum called her attention seeking and said "anyone who does that is pathetic". Little did she know, her own daughter has been doing it for 3 years. My sister went on about how depressed people are just silly because if you want something you should just get up and deal with it and gave the old line about how "there are people worse off than us". But they just don't understand depression. Now that has really prevented me from wanting to open up to them and I really need help. I am ready to accept help. But how can I when I know my own family will not be supportive?
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Offline mta214

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Re: Need some advice.
« Reply #1 on: January 10, 2014, 07:04:12 PM »
You are doing the right thing by seeking help and support!!  You don't mention how old you are.  Are you in high school?  If so, start by making an appointment with the school psychologist.  He/She will be able to help you on how to talk to your family.  Please don't keep this to yourself.  You're not alone.
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Offline XOTWOD

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Re: Need some advice.
« Reply #2 on: January 10, 2014, 07:07:56 PM »
Thank you. However, I am not in school, I am 18 and currently looking for work. I am just too scared to talk to anyone especially after hearing my mum and sister judging someone who in a similar situation as mine. I mean, how can I trust anyone, if not my own family?
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Offline nobody

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Re: Need some advice.
« Reply #3 on: January 10, 2014, 08:04:48 PM »
People confabulate on a daily basis, just because they think they need a reason to explain why they like something or why they are for or against something, that doesn't mean that the person actually believes what he or she is saying, it's more in line of having a certain emotion towards something & trying to put it into words to channel how they feel towards a subject.

I think if you really put some time in it & explained to your relatives what exactly depression & anxiety are, I'm sure they'll understand, opinions like those are made out of pure ignorance just because, as I said, human beings have a flawed desire to have an opinion about anything, even if they don't know what they're talking about at all.
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Offline mta214

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Re: Need some advice.
« Reply #4 on: January 11, 2014, 06:25:11 AM »
Is there another family member other than your mum and sister who you might feel comfortable talking to - maybe an aunt, cousin, etc? 
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Offline XOTWOD

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Re: Need some advice.
« Reply #5 on: January 12, 2014, 07:11:51 PM »
I understand that sometimes we say things that we dont really mean, but it just has made me really apprehensive about telling my mum and sister. Maybe i will try bringing up the topic just to hear their views about it. We arent close to any other family and i dont have any friends that i can trust, especially when it comes to my personal life. I really dont have anyone to talk to, im building the courage gradually to see my GP by myself. Hopefully i will be able to see a therapist and then be able to tell my family. My main goal for this year is to get better.
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