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Author Topic: Major setback... Could use some advice  (Read 153 times)

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Offline Gomubukai

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Major setback... Could use some advice
« on: December 26, 2013, 09:16:21 PM »
My main fear is ms after some drastic tingles last year and a sports masseuse who planted the seed of fear in my mind last August. She wanted me to get an MRI and ct scan but my doctor didn't think they were necessary so I haven't had them done.

Since then ms has constantly been on my mind. During every activity. And I mean everything. I live in Australia and its summer. Every time I go outside I think 'I wonder if its hot enough outside right now for me to show any signs of heat intolerance if I had ms?' Every time I excersise (which I'm now quite scared to do)
I think 'I wonder if this will make the tingles come back?'

The tingles lasted weeks and I saw two doctors about it who weren't concerned enough about it to send me for MRI. My doctor actually said to me 'there are no signs of ms or anything sinister' after doing a brief neuro.

I was doing really well the past month or so too. I've been using some CbT worksheets I found online and they seem to be helping.
 
But two days ago the dreaded tingles made a reappearance. All down my right leg and in my foot. They're no where NEAR as bad as last time. But I'm afraid one morning m going to wake up and they'll be as bad or worse than last time. I'm afraid to excersise in case it sets it off again.

I was really upset yesterday and actually cried for a bit. My mother said to me 'I can't be in the house when you're in this mood. I'm going out somewhere.' Which of course is just wonderful when you're already feeling like crap.

She told me this morning that I'm being silly and to just get on the treadmill.

I don't know what to do to snap out of this after doing so much better lately.

I know it seems illogical but I keep thinking what if the sports masseuse was right and I really do have ms?
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Offline michelle360

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Re: Major setback... Could use some advice
« Reply #1 on: December 26, 2013, 09:37:19 PM »
Hey. Sorry to hear you have had a setback. That being said nothing has changed since we spoke about this awhile back. You are creating these symptoms in your head. You are worrying about exercise and heat intolerance why? First off not everyone with ms actually has heat/exercise intolerance. Now if you just thought "great now I know I have MS cause I have all the symptoms except heat/excercise intolerance" then there ya go. HA ALL THE WAY. As I remember it, your masseuse is the only person who gave this theory ANY credibility and you saw actual REAL doctors who all told you no. Have you had any other symptoms besides some tingling? Did you wake up blind or seeing double? do you get so exhausted you can't move? Do you feel like a lightning bolt hit your spine when you touch your chin to your chest? Have you ever fallen down while walking because your legs simply stopped working? Have you had your legs be numb to temperature for weeks on end and felt numb from the waist down for the same amount of time? Can you have an orgasm? If you answered yes to most of these questions and no to the last one you MIGHT have MS.
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Offline stephtronic

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Re: Major setback... Could use some advice
« Reply #2 on: December 26, 2013, 09:40:06 PM »
Who do you think is more qualified to assess MS? A masseuse or multiple medical doctors?
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Offline Gomubukai

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Re: Major setback... Could use some advice
« Reply #3 on: December 26, 2013, 09:45:26 PM »
Hi Michelle

Thanks for answering so fast. I have no idea what's wrong with me. I'm just teary and tired all the time this week... So lame.

I know it doesn't make sense for me to be so worried about this at the moment. I do honestly, logically know that.

But this week I can't seem to get past it. It's probably the biggest setback I've had for ha since I started on the road to recovery and I'm hoping that's what's making me so exhausted and emotional.

The fact I WAS actually starting to believe I was ok.

I'm hoping its the stress of the holidays.

I want to be able to give myself a break. Even with my hobbies and stuff this past week I've been SO hard on myself. Expecting perfection where I can never achieve it... Hobbies are supposed to be relaxing :p

I don't understand it. It's exhausting.

But really thank you! I'm hoping once I've read your reply four or five more times it will sink in enough to give me a kick in the pants and motivate me to get back into trying to help myself get OVER THIS.

Thanks Michelle - happy holidays :)
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Offline Gomubukai

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Re: Major setback... Could use some advice
« Reply #4 on: December 26, 2013, 09:47:04 PM »
Thanks stephtronic :)

You're right of course. She was the one who put the idea in my head and terrified me so badly.

If I could wind back the clock I would NEVER have gone and seen her. :(
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Offline michelle360

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Re: Major setback... Could use some advice
« Reply #5 on: December 26, 2013, 10:12:31 PM »
Well I hope I can help you. Also try to think of it this way. Sure MS sucks and it sucks worse for some more than others, but it is NOT the end of the world. The worse case scenario is you end up in a wheelchair right? Well, does a person in a wheelchair actually have a life that isn't worth living? No. But people with HA spend their lives living in pure hell whereas most people in wheelchairs find a way to overcome their disability and enjoy life any way they can. Which one would you rather suffer from? Hand me the damn wheelchair. Honestly.

That being said everyone has setbacks and crappy days. It's life. The thing that sets people apart is how they deal with it.

Hang in there and keep on keeping on!
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