My name is Dani and I am new to this site although I have been here many times before googling my symptoms. >>>sigh<<< Haven't we all? I decided to register today because I am desperate for someone to talk to about my anxiety. I have been in therapy and am myself a therapist but right now I just need someone to really understand.
My husband is an incredible support and listens to me with compassion but it's not the same as talking to someone who has experienced it. It would mean the world to me to talk to who truly gets it. I would not be looking to exchange any contact information besides and e-mail address and have myself created an alternate account for this very reason. If anyone is interested please comment and I'll send you my e-mail.
This is essentially what I'm dealing :
I have been anxious for most of my life and would characterize myself as a worrier. Over the past two years, however, it has gotten extremely bad. Two years ago I sought help from a therapist for the first time and found great relief. I was okay (which for me is minimal anxiety) for several months. This past February I lost my grandpa and just about lost myself. I think I have just slumped out of a mild depression (no sex drive, no energy, you know the drill) but have been extremely anxious along with the depressed feelings for the last several months.
My latest symptom, which is causing me the most distress/extreme fear/panic is this sense of everything in my head being really fast and feeling disconnected from the world. To prevent any confusion, I am not manic. It's not that kind of fast thinking nor is it racing thoughts. It's something that I can't quite explain and it makes me feel like I'm losing my mind.
I am very tired all the time. I never have any energy. I am working and going to grad school full time though so part of it is from that. I did quit working for two/three months though with the sole intent of resting and still felt that I was drained all the time. I had bloodwork done a few months ago (no anemia, no thyroid issue, glucose levels are fine).
I just don't feel like myself. I tried going back to my therapist and she basically told me that my problems are stemming from the fact that I'm conflicted about whether or not I want to have children. While that is true I was hoping for more effective intervention. As I said, I am myself a therapist, and she basically told me that "therapists are competitive" and she never even offered to schedule me for another apt. I should go see another therapist but I'm so disgusted with how she acted.
I do not take any anxiety meds and never have nor do I ever want to. I hate medication and it makes me feel like I'm out of control and then I get anxiety about the side effect. Not to mention the fact that several of my family members pop Benzo's like Pez Candies which makes me even more apprehensive.