im sorry to say this but please dont count om friends for any support..count on yourself and your close family only, when i had bad anxiety nobody cared..thats when i realized that yes..people are really out for their own..all the growing up friendship thing fades after you teen years and people dont really want to bother with you or your problems, the only ones that helped me were my close family and the rest i dealt with on my own, uve got yourself..love yourself and be strong.
Hi, i totally agree with this as well.
As a young guy i used to have typical male friendships, some of which stretched back to my nursery days. I thought some of them were very close, yet when my anxiety became too much of a problem to conceal anymore a few years ago and i was officially diagnosed with GAD, they gradually became ever more busy and noticeable by their lack of absence. I found that although friends are there for you during the good times thats sadly not always the case during the difficult times. I wasn't even asking them for anything! Yet most of them haven't spoken to me in at least 2 years. They just faded away with no reason ever given.
Some of my friends did remain, which made them more precious to me.
Its when you face the difficult times in your life that real friends can be truly identified. Others will fade away. Likewise, recently my relationship ended which left me pretty down and distraught... and again, certain friends i've made have disappeared or are suddenly busier in their personal lives. This time though i've been prepared for it so don't feel broken or bitter as i did the first time around.
Do i feel i've lost friends? No, not really... they were never of much weight in the first place. As depressing as it sounds, london23 is generally correct when he says that most people really are out for their own. Most people don't want their lives inconvenienced by heavy, weighty issues their friends are periodically brought down by. Offering support isn't their first instinct. Rather, they think of what suits them best: its easier just to make themselves less available and focus on other friends, or finding new friends who make life easier and more pleasant for them. The sort of friendship use-value you used to fill for them previously. Not everyone is this way, mind you... but the majority are. I agree with london23 there. Again, thats why when i true friend is discovered, they should be valued even more.
The sad reality is that when we look to others to support us, we are often left disappointed and hurt. London21 is right when he advises that the best person to rely on is yourself. That way you won't be let down. Finding that inner strength that resides within ourselves is a resource we can have that never fails us, unlike reliance on others.
One thing i do thank the periodic crisis episodes in my life for is that, as london23 intimates, is that it makes you realise just how valuable your close family are. During both bad my anxiety and breakup episodes they were my rock in a way that surprised even me. It made me appreciate even more just how dear they are to me. My relationship only broke up a month ago suddenly... it left me pretty devastated yet thanks in large part to their constant support, i'm in a much better place than i was a short time ago.