Hello! I am Elena. I am new here, however, I have been reading for many years and have gained a lot of strength and support in that way. What's even funnier is that I'm a psychologist and have no idea how to handle my own anxieties/emotions. I have been like many of you, with many different diagnoses and symptoms, certain I was going to die. I am in the midst of yet another attack. For two days I had blood in my stool...went to the doctor, diagnosed with hemorrhoids and referred on to general surgeon for further inspection. I was a mess when I got there and they handled me with kid gloves for the most part, except the nurse who came in and told me that because of my symptoms I needed a colonoscopy (I am terrified of all things medical, especially needles). When the doctor came in, he confirmed hems and gave me a script for some suppositories, told me I needed to try to clear up the longstanding constipation with fiber and water, and to check back in 6 weeks to see if things have improved. If they haven't, colonoscopy time. Which I'm fine with, if blood would go on that long I would be more than happy to do so. Anyway, the blood has been gone now for as long as I had it. At least what I can see. It was probably the hems got all jacked up and bled, but my mind refuses to believe its that simple. In my mind, I am DYING. My life is OVER. This time is DIFFERENT. I am 32 years old and have a small child and I just KNOW that this time I'm right and I'm going to have to leave this world and my son at such a young age. I'm super depressed. No one understands me. Please help me.
Oh, and I want to note I've had persistent tailbone pain for a year and a half and now I'm certain it's connected to my imminent diagnosis of colorectal cancer. Or even worse, metsasticized.