I can understand what your saying PhreakOvNature. When I thought I was having a Heart Attack (due to anxiety and Shingles pain) I was convinced it was the end and my kids were going to be without a father. It was the most gut wrenching feeling I've ever experienced. And then the ER doc says, nope you got shingles, here is some antibiotics and pain meds.
Hmm, alright but then the thoughts started. Death, Death, and Death again. It was so bad I couldn't even watch, listen or talk about dying as it made me spin into a panic attack. (This is due to the constant pain from Shingles)
Finally I found my faith again. When it is my time there is nothing that can be done about it. No amount of ER visits or EMT training will stop what is meant to happen. I am fully in my Gods hands and allow him to guide me. One of the most remarkable things I can share with you was my 2nd panic attack where I was convinced I was having a heart attack. My chest hurt, my arm was numb, my head was swimming. I was sweating and feeling breathlessness just trying to keep it together to get into my car and drive to the ER. (yeh DRIVE to the ER...)
I dropped to my knees and begged for my God to guide me. Take my hand and thoughts and push me to where I need to be. Know where I ended up? Laying down on my couch with all the panic and fear subsiding.
The point of all of this is how I have learned to not allow Death to consume me, but acknowledge the existence of Mortality and instead allow LIFE to consume me. It WILL happen to us all. When is not important. Why is not important. Making the most of what we have each and every day IS Important.
It is not easy, and no amount of therapy or guidance you receive will stop your thoughts unless YOU want them to stop.
Stay Strong and enjoy Life :)