If you're here to say hey or give me good vibes, hey, my name's lee.
If you're here to give some advice / help, let me fill you in on some things about me.
My life is pretty alright. My life mainly revolves around music. (I love 80's music like the smiths and the cure, I love 70's psychedelic like pink floyd and the beatles, I love jazz like dave brubeck and miles davis, I love psychedelic jazz like sun ra, I love 80's shoegaze like my bloody valentine and slowdive, I go everywhere man.) I'm in a band, we get gigs about every two weeks and we're pretty good. We're the only decent indie-pop band in town. No offense to them, but they're not too important to me. We sound like a band called beach fossils. I have a habit of switching my friends about every year. Freshman year I hung out with stoners and ditched school, listened to the doors and got high everyday. Sophomore year I ditched them and met cigarette smokers my age and I ditched school, listened to the smiths and smoked cigs all day. Junior year (which is right now) I'm hanging out with these 3 guys I'm in a band with. I met them a couple months before the school year started. I quit cigarettes, but I get stoned occasionally (which is like twice a month or something.) Even though I change my friends all the time, I do have one best friend who I met in kindergarten and hang out with most of the time. We have mostly the same interest, and jam with our guitars together all the time. I had a couple of girlfriends my entire life, but none of them were really important. I dated this girl for 3 years one time, but she cheated on me freshman year and that's how it obviously ended. It wasn't really important, but I guess I owe her some credit because she made me realize how much I hate modern people. Everyone mostly disgusts me, it's wicked hard for me to be well attracted to someone. I mean, I think girls are beautiful, and some of them are cool, but I always see the flaws in them. They're flaws stand out so much to me. I don't know man. I live in a very suburban town, but the area I live in is pretty lame and boring. A couple nights ago, I had this dream I was racing my friend. I have no idea where we were, it looked like a brownish moon. The stars were extremely vivid, which is not often because I'm slightly colorblind. (It's not too serious, I just can't see some shades and hues clearly as you do. Anyways, we were going wicked fast, and then eventually we started doing leaps while we were running. Our leaps became higher and higher each time. They evenutally were so high it took like 4 seconds to get down. Then my friend said "don't go too high, you'll break the universe." or something like that. I ignored him and went high then everything, literally everything got sucked into a vortex or something and everything was black. I felt like I didn't exist or something, I couldn't move, everything was dark, then finally, I see a person just standing there, and I was able to change the way he looked. I think I was building a new universe or something. I don't know, but then I woke up in the middle of the afternoon, terrified of my own imagining. I'm not sure what happened, but it definitely scared me more than a normal dream without ghosts or monsters should have. Since that dream, I've been getting sleepless at night. I don't want to be cliche and blame a damn dream, but I don't what else to blame. Nothing in my life has changed too much. I'm always thinking wicked melancholic things at night now. I'm so awake and can't sleep until the suns up. I want to find some drugs and hope that they'll fix me, but I found this site and thought I'd give it a chance. I'm sorry for being so out of place and long with this thread, I'm new and not sure what I'm supposed to tell you in order to help me. If you read this, thanks and I'm excited to hear what you have to say.