Read this, you must hear how this ends.
Well my latest and nearest fear is back to my original one. Barrett's esophagus and cancer. I am 37 , I last had these fears at about 4 years ago as I am a lifetime sufferer of GERD and I googled Barrett's esophagus . Well I had an endoscope which showed mild esophagus inflammation in some spots but nothing bad, vocal cords were red and irritated but no Barrett's esophagus and no cancer. They took a biopsy of something the report spud but when I questioned what they said nothing at all to worry about and all was fine. I then took off happy about the high of not dying and stuck strict on Aciphex since then and eat right for a while. Alcohol has been my biggest downfall over the last 4 years it helped calm me of the other 41 diseases I've been dying of once a week since. Guys I have honestly spent about 13,000 dollars in a decade chasing diseases bad getting tested for things I was sure I had , but didn't . My wife is tired of it , not only the financial drain but how it ruins our lives. I smiled last week and she said "honey you are handsome when you smile , I think I've seen it twice in 10 years" . So I have been so anxious lately since a big night on the drink 3 months back had me vomiting heavily in the yard all night and I could taste nothing but acid all next day. Anyhow two weeks ago I feel the globus thing we all know of and a bit of throat stinging and I tell the doctor and he says, your Aciphex might be calming the burning but your croaky voice , phlegm and acid taste in mouth all indicate they aren't working . You have had silent reflux all along . So I go into Barretts fear again full swing and seek second opinion from a doctor who knows me personally. He says it's always been anxiety Jim always has and you gotta treat that first and stop chasing symptoms. My wife made me promise I wouldn't ruin our first weekend away together in years with anxiety and self pitty and I promised . But I left her on her own to go to another doctor and ask what's my chances of having barretts now that wasn't there 4 years ago, then I googled it and they say it can devellop and won't be seen in its development stages like 4 years ago.
So I flip my lid, don't talk all weekend and just shake and frown and then get back home and call up for another 1000 dollar endoscope procedure just it double check. Well 10 years ruined and no money or good times left my wife packed her bags and left me . Out here on our spread with no neighbours , the sound of silence , nothing but my thoughts and regrets , possible Barrett's esophagus and a wife who won't remember any happy times if I died of cancer . Don't do it to yourself guys . Don't ever do it. You'll ruin today worrying about tomorrow , but maybe you'll ruin a whole lot more . I am writing this lonely and scared of esophagus cancer .