Hi. I've been managing a team of 13 analysts for the past year. I have to let one of them go, next week, because of company lay-offs...not because of poor performance. The employee is a single mom and someone who has been trying VERY hard. I've never had to layoff anyone who was a perfectly competent employee and this is weighing on we more than I ever expected.
I have never felt this stressed, at any time in my 42 years on this planet. I am heartbroken for my employee, I feel like I'm being forced into the role of a "bad guy" and scared about the stability of my own job. I've been trying breathing exercised, visualization and exercising myself to exhaustion, to try and get rid of this stress...but nothing is working. (i've even tried allowing myself to have several crying jags...all I got were sinus headaches to add to my stomachache. My stomach aches, almost non-stop.)
I have been having frequent headaches and last night, I woke up at about 4AM with my heart beating so fast, I was having trouble counting my pulse. (Granted, it was 4AM, so the trouble counting may have had more to do with still being half asleep, lol.)
I've had times when my heart was beating so hard, I could see my chest move, but I've never had a racing heart, like this, without having just run a race.
Normally I have relatively low blood pressure. But I take Adderall for my ADHD, and for years, the Adderall simply bumped my low blood pressure up into the "normal" range. But in the past few months, my non-Adderall blood pressure is normal, but when I'm taking the Adderall, it's elevated into the not-good range. So they put me on a beta-blocker.
Does a racing heart have anything to do with blood pressure? If so, shouldn't my beta-blocker be keeping this from happening? Could a racing heart be an indication of heart problems or is it a panic attack thing?
Any suggestions would be welcome.