You know my story I'm sure, under heaps of stress for past 2 months, nervous breakdown and all that. My forgetting stuff is still coming out here and there. Didn't have any yesterday but today had it 3 times. One time I was thinking I should pull out my laptop when I WAS ALREADY USING IT. Sorta like when you look for glasses you're already wearing, right? Another one was when I was using a motorized razor and deep in thought about my in laws, I had the thought I should turn the razor on but yeah, it was on the whole time and I was using it.
And now I'm also afraid of having some kind of intestinal problem because my unmentionable region hurts after I have a BM (and it was a bit sore before, too.) So now I'm thinking polyps, prolpases, etc OH MY.
I also had free floating anxiety/fear sensation today that "attached" itself to my blanket. yeah, my blanket. For a split second I felt a pang of fear about my blanket. It's like I feel slightly afraid all the time about nothing -- and then bing, it attaches to something for a second and then unattaches and goes back to just being an all over jittery mild "danger somewhere" sensation.
I think my brain is melting.
(I'm on Celexa right now, 10 mgs. It's day 6 but haven't had my 6th dose just yet. (I actually was looking at the wrong week on the calendar when I searched for the day I started it because I knew I started it on a Friday but I was looking at the previous one. What IS that?) I have a lot more wacko head sensations on this stuff, real loopy and way anxious.)
Do you ever do a whole lot of really wacko stuff when you're in your worst high anxiety? How long do you stay in your anxiety and worries? I have been worrying non stop for about 2 months. Every new thing is another layer of worry to worry about, and I'm worried about worrying.
cancer, heart problems, getting to a doc, waiting to see a doc, scared it will take too long to get/see one, scared of what they will say, scared of brain tumor, scared of mad cow, scared of Alzheimer's, scared I've taken too much xanax leading to alzheimer's, scared my docs are idiots who can't help me, scared I am treated like a cow instead of a person with medical places, scared I'll lose my mind, scared I'll have intrusive harm thoughts, scared I will forget everything, scared I have kidney problems, scared of my intestinal soreness, scared of my free floating anxiety, scared of my jitters and agitation, scared of the Celexa not working, scared of gaining weight, scared of eating sometimes, scared for health and safety of my family, scared my in laws will write/call and threaten me more, scared I won't be able to spell words or find my words anymore (I have been terrible with typing for the past few months), scared of EVERYTHING ELSE, too.