Well, obviously, I'm anxious. That's why I joined this group, of course. A good way to get a lot off your chest.
So, I guess here are some of my ticks.
*I have to lock every single door close to my room, in fear of someone coming in unexpectedly to cause me harm. Not anyone in my family, or anyone like that, but just a general intruder, or home invader. I can't concentrate on anything I'm doing unless they're all locked, and even if I know for a fact they are all locked, I'll still get up a few times just to double check.
*I won't wear white t shirts, because I feel like people can see through them. It takes me quite a long time to pick out something to wear, because I also have a difficult time wearing some colors, like red, or other things, in fear that they have animal derives (I'm a vegan, although this stuff is more than obsessional.) Why red, you may ask? I don't know, really.
*Intrusive thoughts.... all the time!
*I have a big fear of contaminating people (this happens mostly at work.) For example, I drop a bottle (I work at a movie theater,) and I'm afraid to put it back in the theater, because I'm scared that it has been contaminated, I guess. Another example, I left ketchup out at home overnight. It was fine, and I put it back in the refrigerator, but I worried myself senseless that someone was going to get really sick from it in my household.
*If I spill drinks on particular areas of my pants, I cannot concentrate. I've even bought new pants to wear that day because of it.
*It is difficult for me to talk to people, even though I would actually consider myself a people person. I always have a million things to say, but they just never come out right, or I ramble a lot, have many awkward pauses, and so on. It's infuriating, to say the least.
And the list goes on. I've been extraordinarily more anxious these past few weeks, and it sucks. I can't even watch a movie, my favorite hobby, without a million things going on through my head, to the point that I just shut it off. Same as listening to music. I don't want those things to be a chore, or feel like an assignment, I love those things. I've been getting a ton of headaches, and just, eh. I dunno, this stuff just always seems to come out at random.
I've never really had an official diagnosis, I usually just focused on anxiety in general. I've tried in the past to get help for this junk (counseling, pills, etc.) and it helped, but I was pulled off of it. I'm only eighteen, and I can't really easily gain access to help like that, so what other help could you recommend? Unfortunately, none of the self help procedures I read about really work very well for me.