It's been a couple of years since I have been on this forum. Years in which my anxiety mostly abated and I lived a normal life --- being present for my children, doing a good job at work, friends, husband and all those wonderful things. Last month I was doing a power walk and my right hip began to hurt. I have always had problems with this hip since I gave birth to my first child. After two weeks I went to see a doctor who examined my leg and said I had probably pulled a muscle and sent me to PT. In the meantime, my right abdominal side also began to hurt below my right ribs, on my side (like a stitch in my side) and then in my right lower abdomen as well as around to my back. I went back to the doctor who ordered a complete metabolic panel and then did a pelvic. Everything was normal. I started PT and she stated my hips are out of alignment and the joint in my right hip is very loose causing muscle and ligament strain to the abdominal muscle area. She also said I had lots of scar tissue from previous c-sections and a appendectomy. Since that time I have been unable to get the thought out of my head that I have some form of cancer, most likely pancreatic cancer. I have pain in the upper right abdomen that radiates to the back, lack of appetite, nausea and fatigue. However I have not had significant weight loss or anything else. I went to my primary care doctor and told her of my fears. She didn't even examine me but asked me to show her where I hurt, said it was consistent with a muscle thing, and then began to discuss my health anxiety and specifically my SSRI which she was concerned had stopped working. Today I started day 2 of a new SSRI.
I am completely willing to believe all this is in my head BUT how do I know it is not pancreatic or any other terrible cancer without any imaging or some sort of rule out exam? I still have the pain. It is there. And I feel terrible. I am trying to meditate, take my SSRIs and get on with it. But in truth I am beyond terrified. Even skipped work today because I felt so faint and shaky.
I can't believe I fell down this rabbit hole again. Googling symptoms, obsessing, taking to my bed! How do i move past this without tests for these symptoms, or do i need to do those to move past this?