I have been under great stress lately and I have been feeling pressure and been attacked and debased by my in laws. My husband has been only somewhat helpful because he still is not very strong in the face of anyone attacking me or us. We tend to sit back and take stuff and not fight, try not to show our anger etc. We get walked on and dominated etc.
I have been having a sort of month long nervous breakdown of some kind with a lot of crying, panic, rumination, OCD, and a lot of other strong symptoms. I am waiting to talk with a psychiatrist about it and they're supposed to set up an appointment soon.
Yesterday I was at the store with my hubby and daughter and we got into the car, he gave me the keys and got our daughter into her carseat while I turned the car on. It's something I always do, and I was concentrating on something at the time. When he got into he car he asked if I'd turned the car on and I said, "No, I don't remember doing that." And I didn't actually remember doing it at all. It was so weird. I thought about it for a minute and THEN remembered that yes, I had turned it on and I'd been concentrating on a family parking sign when I did it.
Today we were discussing going to the store and also the library and kept mixing up the order we were doing things so we went to the library and since it's in a school and the kids were coming out, hubby said let's go to the store first, so we did. I waited in the car for him with my daughter while he ran in and I talked with her about the names of the kids in her class.
Thing is we went to the library after and I said, "Let's just not to go the store, I'm really tired." And hubby was saying, "We already WENT to the store." I didn't have any memory of having gone until he reminded me, and I stopped and thought and then remembered waiting in the car and chatting with my daughter and everything we talked about.
So this is very very weird for me, it's never happened before I don't think. I'm just very upset because I have been having a hard time with anxiety attacks, panic, my in laws have been threatening us and my MIL was over here yelling at me a few days ago. I also got nasty emails from my sister in law and my father in law is threatening to fire my husband from his job for staying home with me (because I'm not well right now, panicking and crying all day and stuff.)
Is this memory stuff from anxiety? Can that HAPPEN? Has anyone done something then completely had no memory of it, then remembered it when someone reminded them of it? I'm so scared because I have also had problems with my typing (sometimes I type a word other than the one I'm thinking) and speech at times, where I am thinking of a word and say a different one or one time last week I opened my mouth (almost wrote "mind") and was thinking of what to say but the words didn't come out, just some stammering stuff. Then I was like, "What was THAT? I knew what I wanted to say but couldn't say it."
I am all terrified now, thinking I have mad cow or some other horrible brain disease.
I have been under extreme, EXTREME stress this past month but since last November it's been really bad. My nervous breakdown pretty much has been going on for the past month or two.