Alright, so I had my "meet and greet" it was a little bit odd. The doctor seemed nice for the most part, I told her that I have anxiety, but I failed to mention that I'm terrified of doctors.
She asked me what kind of prescriptions I'm on, and I said that I have one for lorazepam. Her eyes got huge, and she basically told me that I shouldn't be on such a habit forming drug, and that they would never do a refill for me because it's dangerous. Alright, I guess I can deal with not being on lorazepam if it actually is this horrible for me and I get a doctor who actually listens and seems concerned with that I'm telling her. I actually really do like having lorezapam though.. it makes me feel so much better when I'm getting too anxious. I don't abuse it at all. I only take it when I need to and it helps tremendously.
I told her that I quit smoking cigarettes 4 months ago, and she kept telling me how it was so great that I quit and to never ever go back to smoking, she told me this 3 times. I'm not planning on going back to smoking cigarettes.
The last thing, well this is a bit of a weird issue.. is that she asked me if I smoked marijuana, and I said that yes, occasionally I do. (I didn't want to admit to it, but I thought I should probably be honest with my potential doctor, plus she didn't give me any lectures for telling her that I occasionally drink beer.) her eyes got huge once again, and she looked absolutely horrified, like I had just told her I was banging heroin into my big toe or something. She told me that it's very, very bad that I smoke marijuana, and that it is very habit forming and that it is very often laced with other things because it's not legal. Then she told me to quit doing it. I've been smoking mj for a long time. It's never been an issue for me, and I've never had any laced with anything. In my opinion if she was going to get all lecturey about the weed she probably should have reacted similarly upon me telling her that I drink beer. Whatever, not the point of this topic.
I've also ... never had a physical. I know, I know, I should have had a bunch already but I haven't, because I'm so scared of doctors. Once she found this out she again... had this horrified look on her face and told me I needed one ASAP, and that it was very bad that I haven't had one yet.
I booked a physical with her, asked the last doctor I went to, to fax over my medical info, and now I'm almost regretting it.
I don't like it when doctors make me feel bad for decisions I make. It made me feel like she was judging me.I know she was just doing her job, but I'm worried this isn't going to be good for me and my anxious worrying.
My last doctor didn't take me seriously at all, and was a little bit unprofessional to be honest, but he never made me feel bad. It's just like I'm going from a doctor who doesn't really care about my health, to a doctor to who cares even more than I do and will possibly make me worry more.
I was just answering questions so I couldn't think of everything I needed to say so I'm a little bit angry with myself that I didn't mention how much going to the doctor bothers me and how worried I get over health issues.
I'm sick of searching for a good doctor. So many don't even take in new patients. What do you guys think? Is it weird that she refuses to have me on lorezapam, should I just see how the phsyical goes? Am I thinking this over too much? Probably.
Do you like your current doctor, or do you have issues with them as well?