I can totally relate to "Trapped in my bedroom", I don't venture out much during the day unless it's to take the dog out to go potty. I do still get out but as soon as I hit the door back into the house I am right back on the bed in the same spot. I still pick up the kids, go to dr appts, go to the store/pharmacy, maybe even a family event (but I don't stay long). I guess I feel safe here in my room. Why go out and drive somewhere with all these crazy driving people out there. Maybe it's b/c I have been in 6-7 car accidents, not at fault, 2 of the accidents were life changing. I wish so badly the last lady who hit me in 2006 had just been looking where she was going. Now after 4 fusion surgeries, I can hardly walk and will NEVER walk normally again. I don't want to risk it anymore sometimes and others I want to work and help my husband support our family. I usually have no problem getting an interview but dread going b/c once they see my limp or that I am in sneakers even though American's with Disabilities Act protects my rights & privacy stating I don't have to disclose that information but I am always straight up and explain. You would think it's my limp that causes me most anxiety but it's my teeth... Either way I end up back in the bedroom again either searching for another position or watching TV. I have gained weight which I know once I get up off my rump I will loose some of the extra weight. Also I have major dental work that has to be done and it embarrasses me to open my mouth to speak or laugh b/c I know how bad it looks usually panic before I ever talk. The whole time I am worried and wondering what the other person is thinking. I would rather just stay in the bedroom, drink my coca-cola and watch Dish. My husband promises to let me get my teeth repaired when he gets health insurance enrollment complete via his employer.
Everyday I dread him coming home, not being with him or him being home, the moment he walks in the door. I manage to do my chores most days and anxiety explodes waiting for him to say something mean or yell at me about something I missed. It happens everyday. I am scared to ask him for gas money or even share an idea. He makes me feel stupid even though I know he is the idiot. I could go on and on and on with why I am right here in the bedroom.