I'm really scared and frustrated at the same time, 'cause in the last week I was really doing so much better, less anxious and away from googlin all day and find new ways of worrying, and now here I am again and it's worse than ever.
Maybe it's also because my dad is not here and so I do feel like I can't talk to anybody, nontheless, I feel like I'm gonna loose it.
All because around 4-5 days ago I was feeling nervous and anxious and started to have swallowing problems, but they lasted just one night so I wanted to be rational and be like: "obviously it's because of the anxiety" and then after taking the benzos helped a little bit.
But then around 3 days ago I started to have cramps and general stomachache and I started to feel super anxious and also had a bad taste in my mouth, yesterday it seemed a little bit better but since I've woken up today I feel my heart beat really heavily in random parts of my body like my head and chest (more than normal) and now I feel feverish and have also a bit of headache (which is not unusual for me)
Obviously, considering that I've done my exams and my heart seems fine (excluding my TOS problem which I'm trying to solve) I went to google again about rabies and there were all the symptoms so the HA is here and it won't go away. I also tried again to search for the cat that scratched me but I can't stay near the building like a lot of time unless I want to be considered a complete freak or actually becoming one.
I know that going to the doctor won't help considering also that rabies is not possible to find until it attacks the system, but I'm afraid that the virus has already taken over and I'm going to die like in a week. I have this double situation for which I want to know and at the same time I don't want to, and besides my country has been declared rabies free like on february so I think if I go to the doctor and ask infos he will most likely laugh in my face.
What do I do? I know I wrote a lot of stuff but I'm really freaked out right now and I'm hoping that someone can help me out with the anxiety a bit, considering that there's still that rational part of me somewhere, maybe if i can find it, I'll be better.