My point is that I could have got it tested or removed,but for me to get better, I had to live with uncertainty.
Ding, ding, ding. This is exactly right. Certainty is the drug we hypos crave. But unfortunately, it is extremely hard to come by.
I agree with whoever it was who said that if what the doctors saw alarmed them, they wouldn't make you wait three months for another test. I had abdominal ultrasound a couple of years ago. I did initially see the report, because I figured that if my doctor didn't call, there was no need. Well, several months later I lost my job and ergo, my health insurance, so I went to my doctor to get a copy of all my records and finally got a chance to look at the ultrasound report for myself. Well, imagine my shock when I read that one of my kidneys measured HALF the size of the other one, and "could be indicative of LEFT RENAL ATROPHY" and that a follow-up CT scan was recommended.
I called my doctor right up to figure what exactly that meant and why I was reading this months after it happened. She very calmly explained that, while my pint-sized kidney COULD be atrophying, it could also just be small, or the scan could have been inaccurate in some way. Every one of my previous blood and/or urine tests indicated that my kidneys were working fine, and that absent any discernible symptoms, it was best to wait on the scan. She then went on to say that if I ever did start having kidney problems, that another scan would be in order. So you see, there's a measure of uncertainty over what, if anything, is going on with my kidneys, and I just need to live with not knowing; be okay with the not knowing.