wow! candice... this post could have been written by myself about 3 months ago! that is EXACTLY how I felt. My anxiety was there ALL the time, but the second I opened my eyes every morning, this wave of dread rushed through my body and I wasnt even sure what I was dreading. By mid evening, I felt better but still not great. I used to dread waking up.
Then I got on meds.
Now when I wake up, the dread/panic/terror/anxiety is still there in the background, but I can mostly stop the waves overcoming me and get on with my day. It's always there, it never leaves, but the meds are helping me be able to push it back into it's box and think rationally. Sometimes the waves come back but never as bad.
Everytime I get a new physical symptom (which I still get alot of) I will panic about it, and can feel the anxiety still there, but it's nowhere near as severe as it was back in May when I started and just before I started medication. The meds seem to dull it down rather than cure it.
Around May time, I couldnt fuction. I couldnt keep still but didnt have the energy to move. I wanted to sleep but was scared to wake up. I felt so ill. I thought there was something seriously wrong with me.
I suffer from HA so I kinda still think there is something wrong with me, but the overwhelming, debilitating anxiety that lasts all the time, has subsided alot since going on meds.