New Here - Several Questions

[FlyingFive-0]

Hello all,

I just had a couple of questions regarding General Anxiety Disorder and was hoping someone could point me in the right direction or offer up some advice.

My girlfriend of six months has GAD and I'm hoping to find some advice on what I can do to help her cope with it. It's been getting progressively worse over the last several months; to the point where it is beginning to seriously affect her day to day life. She often has extreme mood swings throughout the day, changes her mind often and can't seem to make even simple decisions without becoming anxious or worried. It affects her physically as well. She constantly has intense back and muscle pain and frequently gets bad headaches. She has to eat every two to three hours or she becomes moody, anxious, and angry. When she gets in these moods she becomes extremely hostile, mean and impossible to reason with. Lately she has lost interest in hobbies and activities she used to love. Physical fitness was extremely important to her, but she will almost never go to the gym now because she "doesn't care". I'm starting to worry that shes becoming depressed, if she isn't already.

She knows that the condition is starting to get out of hand, but feels as though theres nothing she can do. To make matters worse, she hates being on medication, has a doctor that does little to help her, and parents that don't understand or offer any support.

She's a great girl that used to be extremely motivated and successful, but unfortunately I've only known her in this state. I'm dying to help her, but I'm completely ignorant to this condition and don't know how to approach it. I love her to death and am the most patient, understanding boyfriend there is, but I'm starting to burn out....

I know its a very broad question, but what can I do to help her as a boyfriend? Is there a key to helping her when shes in one of these "moods"? Finally, is there a resource for family members of someone who has GAD?

I apologize for the broad questions and please pardon my ignorance. I know I'm probably preaching to the choir when I describe her symptoms. I would really appreciate ANY suggestions anyone has.

Thank you for your time,

Flying Five-O

[swan6893]

Hey there
I have about the same symptoms and act pretty much the same way she does. My main problem is that i have health anxiety and every little thing about me i worry about.Thinking i am dying of some terrible disease. I am not much for medicine either but I am sick of being so hateful and feeling like crap and worrying all the time. I am tense, my muscles ache and just have a crappy attitude most of the time. I have a 2 year and 14 years old sons and haven't been the greatest mom either. I used to be active and now i sit on my butt most of the time. My hubby tries to understand but he just doesn't. Unless you feel like this it is probably hard to understand. He tries but it usually annoys me. A few weeks ago I decided that I had had enough and went to a new doctor, (I also felt like mine didn't get it) he tried me on new meds and then we decided that I should see a phychiatrist. Maybe she would try that?? The only reason i don't like the meds is because they always seem to make me gain weight and thats the only reason why I quit them before. But i have realised that i would rather be happy and not worry so much.  I guess if nothing else then maybe you could at least get her to see a different doctor, One thats a little more understanding of her situation. I know i kinda jumped all over the place here but i hoped that i helped you a little. If you need anything else or anyone to ask questions to I will try to help. You guys are not alone.

swan

[FlyingFive-0]

Thanks a lot for the reply, you gave some really good suggestions.

So far I've tried to get her to see a new doctor, and she agrees that she needs a new one, but she has no motivation to do so. I keep hounding her to call and make an appointment with a new doc, but she never gets around to it. She also has a really bad HMO, which limits her options on seeing different doctors and psychiatrists. I'm working getting her to see a psychiatrist or a counselor.....

Is this lack of motivation and feeling of helplessness normal for GAD? Again, sorry for the ignorant questions.

Thanks for the help!

[swan6893]

I can understand that insurance plays a big part in getting the right help. I know. If you made an appt for her would she go then? It also might help if you went with her if she would let you. I have had this struggle off and on for 10 years and when it first started i wouldn't have made it without my mom there. She went to the doctors with me and helped tell them what was going on.  It really helped me alot to have someone there. Yes i would personally say that lack of motivation and helplessness is part of it.  If you have to choose between doctors i would recommend the psychiatrist if at all possible.
Don't worry about asking questions, I do it all the time.