I cant stand these symptoms longer...they are just getting worse and worse. Im 16 and while most of my friends are out living their lives, im stuck here googling symptoms.
I've had a lot of diseases in my head for the last two months, some of them were not even possible I believe.
First I feared respiratory failure, then It was heart attack. For a short time I was afraid of some rare condition I saw on Mystery ER... I dont even know the name... then it was aneurysm of the abdominal aorta... I went to an echo on the abdomen and they found nothing wrong.
Then when the headaches started I had my brain tumor period, where even though I was scared of dying from it, I felt bad and cried about how I'll never get to achieve anything and my friends will all grow up, ger married, have a career while I lose the battle with the tumor. And at this point my parents took me to a CT scan, and there I got possibly the worst panic attack while waiting for the results. And of course there was nothing...
Then I started worrying about a chiari malformation... because I dont know I had none of the symptoms... but it was short lasting since I went to the doctor 3 times for that. Then I went quiet for 3 weeks I thought this was over but It wasnt. It all came back one day when during aikido practice my friend twisted my neck badly. I had pain and weakness in the arms for a week and I dont think I was more scared in my life. I went to a neurologist yet again to realize again it was nothing. But the pain in the arms and the weakness didnt go away. Then one morning I was bitten by an insect (I believe it was a wasp). If we ignore the first 15 min where I thought Im gonna die from the allergic reaction, I was in stress for full 48 hours that the unknown insect might be poisonous and that I might die from it. I was checking my vital signs every 5 minutes. And i did a blood test the following days, and yet again nothing. I did everything I can and they fear wont go away. Looking things up on the internet makes me calm for a short while, but makes it worse afterwards. If we skip the random stoke fears I have, we get to what is the present time. Yes these were 3 months of my living hell.
Now I have convinced myself I have MS or ALS... I read those things here on the forum and of course I had to google them. I mean the weakness, tingling in the arms, the tightness in the chest, being clumsy, random pain in the limbs... it has to be MS or ALS. Im so scared I will lose my hands, because that would be it. Im a piano player and an artist, i draw and paint so pretty much they are everything to me. I know that if I ask my parents I will get the response "when is your next therapy session" but I just cant stop fearing these things. Are MS or ALS common at the age of 16??? Did the countless of test about my reflexes and stuff by my neurologist are some proof that this is anxiety and not MS, ALS? I just want to be free like I was, to stop worrying about everything... When will the symptoms stop??... is my body stressed even when I seem calm?