My Name is Jeff, I'm 20 years old and here is my story.
I was just a normal guy, going to school upstate NY. To make a long story short, while in college I started smoking pot. I never was a smoker.
One day after a party I and a few people decided to smoke. That was to say, the worst day of my life. Everything changed.
I had my 1st panic attack. It was horrible. I did not know what was going on with me. I thought I was having a heart attack.
I had to go to the ER and that's where they told me I had a panic attack mixed with anxiety. It was just horrible..
Never have I smoked Pot again. It was so bad that I could not even be near it. I can't smell it, it brings back horrible memories.
After that semester ended, I came home, Then vacationed in D.R. and everything was fine. No panic attacks whatsoever.
I eventually had to go back to school. Starting January my Blood Pressure would be the main issue. Almost everyday was BP was high.
I began to think something was wrong with me.
a Few weeks back I had my 2nd panic attack and My BP was up the roof. I took the opportunity to go to the ER and get checked.
Turns out I was healthy.
I just wanted to go home guys. Being alone in school was driving me nuts. I did not feel safe.
After that 2nd time things just became BAD!
Every Night my BP was up the roof, I was shaking, I felt totally helpless.
The 3rd time, they sent me to a psychiatric hospital which made me feel totally crazy and misunderstood.'
No I do not want to hurt myself.
I eventually came home, and things were going great till a few nights ago. It started once again.
I just really want advice. I'm 20 years old and don't want to live like this.
I barely have no friends, and spend my time stuck at home. I really want to turn my life around.
I barely date or talk to any girls. I'm afraid. I have low self steem, I never feel good enough.
I even stopped going to the gym because i feel like my I will have a stroke If i work out too hard.
It hurts to see my mom cry.
I want to overcome this! I really do.
Sometimes I wish I could go back to that day in November and stop myself from smoking that pot.
I try to think positive but nothing helps.