I'm a bit of a wreck

[Jenfr8801]

As some of my previous posts reflect, I'm an hiv worrier. I just started therapy, and he suggested that I go ahead and test to ease my mind. I had a negative test 3-4 years ago, but I've had, what the doctor thinks is an oral fungal infection. That makes my mind go all over the place.

So yesterday I went to my pcp and voiced my concerns. He tried to put my mind at ease, and told me I have nothing to worry about.  He ordered a bunch of tests for me. He actually said he "promises" I'm ok. Now I'm waiting for the Hiv test. He said it would take a couple days. I am having such a hard time waiting. I can't even concentrate on life. I'm a wreck.

[Jenfr8801]

The waiting is really hard

[floridaguy65]

Hi J:)

Sorry you're going through a rough patch. But, as the Doc said, you have nothing to worry about - reasonably. But, with HA / Anxiety, reasonable is often a word that doesn't find a useful place in an amped up mind.

I am having such a hard time waiting. I can't even concentrate on life. I'm a wreck.

Typical HA / AD person's scenario, a lot of the time, when struggling. You just started therapy and this is where you will, hopefully, gain some further insights as to what you might be able to do to help yourself with your mental health challenges. HIV is such an astronomically, near impossible diagnosis for you. So, any lasting peace that you will be able to gather for yourself will come from you seeking out your healing path for your anxiety issues. The HIV testing is wildy secondary to your primary goal of learning how to best help yourself live better alongside your mental health trials. And, this we CAN do:)

Peace and Feel Well:)