Having a really hard time concentrating

[helplessdancer]

I've never really had anxiety about school before, but now I'm having really bad problems concentrating and I'm starting to worry I will start to do badly in school. I almost never read for class anymore, I just skim (if that). I need to do a literature review for a research proposal/my dissertation and I've done nothing for it at all so far. The library didn't have any books, so I gave up.

I have to build a website for another class and I'm feeling very lost about that and confused, but I can't even make myself try to look up some help, I just think "it's too hard, I give up" and then just cry and panic that I will fail. I just can't seem to bring myself to do anything that requires much effort (not even taking out the trash) and I don't know what to do because I've never really had this problem before. Help? 

[shay_87]

Hey, I know exactly where you are coming from. You may need to see you local doctor and discuss my feelings you are having. I'm not a doctor but speaking for expericence it sounds like you have some depression going on there.
Sometimes life can seem a bit hard and everything is piling up on you but you just have to work through thing one task at a time.. don't put so much pressure on yourself. That a deep breath. Dont let issues or worries roll around in you head too long.. acknowledge the concern then push it out of you mind..
I hope that helps a little...

[kconnors]

Hi Dancer (I won't address you as helpless as you are not . . . ),

First, I agree that you need to contact a health professional. Second, you need to contact Student Services at your school and get associated with a counselor who will be able to help guide you to management techniques and intervene on your behalf with your instructors. Third, I suspect (and I could be wrong) but has something triggered this anxiety / depression? Is there some instances of anxiety performance creeping into your thought patterns? Fourth, are you feeling overwhelmed about the workload? the content of the workload? Have you been taking care of yourself --- for example, when I was in university, my food groups consisted of fast foods, Pepsi, and M & Ms and Hershey Kisses) . . . no wonder I felt tired all the time and besides, I was not sleeping very well and my idea of exercise was to hide the remote so I would have to look for it before changing stations except that my favourite hiding place was on the table beside the couch --- not much hunting going on there :) What I am saying is that there are many reasons why you might be in the state that you are in . . . some could be physical, some mental causing physical symptoms . . . your best bet is (1) a doctor and (2) school counselor and (3) know that you are not the first student (I know because it happened to me and it happened to many of my students) to hit a speed bump in academia . . . . but, you will overcome this with guidance even if it means that you postpone your academic commitments . . . nothing is more important than you and your health . . . and it seems that you are in a good place to catch it early on since the symptoms are of recent times. Let us know how you are doing . . .take care, kc

[helplessdancer]

Thanks both of you. I just started seeing the school counselor this week, so I will mention it to him at my next session. I have definitely been having some depression issues as well lately, but I've been feeling better the past couple of days in that regard. I guess I just have been feeling frustrated about this because I am normally a very good student and now I just have no motivation.

kc, I guess the trigger for this could be my parents are finally set to get divorced after being separated for almost two years (long story, but very stressful for me) and now my mom has to sell my house, but I have been having some bad anxiety before that came up. I would also say I'm more overwhelmed by the content of the workload. One of my classes should really be about three separate classes because it is way too much to teach in just one semester. I suppose I'm not eating too well (eating healthy is surprisingly expensive..) but I do walk around a decent amount and do stretches before bed. I am doing a lot better about taking care of my physical health than I was a couple of months ago.

Anyway, as I said, I've been doing better the past couple of days, so hopefully that will keep up. But I will bring it up next week when I see the counselor in case in continues.

[kconnors]

Hi,

You are under a lot of stress because much of your comfort zone, I suspect, is changing in very radical ways. Divorce is never easy even if your parents have been separated. But, you need to process and manage the decision to divorce. There is never a good time for this to happen but because you are in school, I imagine that this is highly distracting for you. Given that your Mom is selling the house that you grew up in, you are also dealing with moving away from that part of your life which, when it is a family home and perhaps where you grew up, is also challenging you to move away from security into the unknown, but you can do it. Your courseload seems quite heavy. Is there a possibility of getting an extension? Postponing a course? Some compromise? Perhaps a study buddy might help? Maybe none of these possibilities is available, but think about them just in case.

Eat as healthy as you can which can be difficult on a restricted budget. You are doing a super thing with walking and stretching. Both all excellent activities especially gentle stretching before bed to relax the muscles. If you are so inclined, perhaps try some mindfulness to count all your positive attributes. Yeah, I know, but life is pretty negative, but you a a valuable positive force so strengthen that by actively remembering it.

I am so pleased that you are doing better. I sense a very strong sense of spirit and you will survive your parents' divorce and manage your anxiety. You may have to take a step or two back, but in the long run, it's only a step or two back in order to go giant leaps forward. You do not seem like the type of person to "give up because something is too hard" but, like all of us, sometimes you need to postpone, heal and recovery, and then move forward.

When you can, let us know how things are going . . .take care, "no longer helpless dancer," . . . KC

[helplessdancer]

Yes, I've definitely had a few big changes recently. Parents divorcing, selling the house (the only house I've ever lived in), and I graduate college in Indiana and came to London to do my graduate degree. Very busy year!

I feel better today about my coursework though, my professor seemed to think I was on the right track and I get together with friends in the class pretty regularly so we can usually sort out the problems together.

I've had anxiety problems in the past, but now I had a big relapse the past couple months. I'm feeling good overall today, so hopefully I'm on the way to getting over this bump. I have a job interview on Monday, and I think finally getting a job will definitely relieve some anxiety, so I'm really hoping this is the one.

PS-My username is actually a song title, but I did used to be a dancer. I'm so bad at thinking of usernames haha. But yes, I am not helpless, I will get through this. 

[kconnors]

Wow! You used to be a dancer so you know discipline and focus . . .excellent positive attributes . . . so glad that things are looking up for you . . . turmoil in our personal lives, especially if we are not at home base, can have an impact on our overall well being but it appears that you have school back in a straight line, a job interview on the horizon, and a supportive circle of friends . . . by the way, as you can tell, I am also bad at user names . . . and, yes, you will get through this and anything else that pops up . . .check in if and when you have the chance . . . best wishes, take care, kc