This is going to be a long post, but I desperately need help, so please, please, take the time to read this if you can help a desperate girl at the end of her emotional rope...
First off, let me explain the situation:
My grandmother has severe dementia. For the past few years, my grandmother has been living with my aunt. When she moved in, my aunt was barely working and her house was about to go into foreclosure. In order to compensate for the work required to care for my grandmother, and to help her keep her house, my grandmother began paying my aunts mortgage.
One of my favorite aunts (not the aunt my grandmother's living with) just died last week. Her funeral is this coming Wednesday, but is in another state. Me, my siblings, and my mother all desperately want to go, but because of work and school and finances, we simply can't. My aunt, however, in her financially unstable situation (she still hardly works) has decided she's going to drive all the way to the funeral (which takes 3 days to get there, 3 days back), but doesn't want to bring my grandmother. Yesterday, while my grandmother was over at my mom's (she comes over every weekend so my aunt and cousin can have a break--but we don't get any money or benefits from it) my aunt calls saying she won't bring my grandmother and that she expects us all to just drop what we're doing so she can go.
Few Side Notes: We have no problem with her going to the funeral; as I said, we all desperately want to go, as well.
I am a full time student, as are my siblings, and my mother, who also works full time. Clearly we have packed schedules and lots of responsibilities, but my aunt has no idea how stressful and draining it is to be in school.
When my mother told my aunt that she needed some time to try to HELP her come up with a solution, my aunt automatically took it as my mother saying "you can't go to the funeral," which wasn't at all the case, she just needed more than a few minutes to come up with where my grandmother was supposed to go for over a week while her primary care provider is out of town (which isn't unreasonable). My aunt started cussing my mom out and being flat out mean to her, bullying her, and then just hung up the phone without letting my mom explain. My mom later got a text saying "don't bring mom (my grandmother) here, i won't be home. I'm done. you deal with it." She literally just dropped this on our laps giving us no time to plan anything, and now we're scrambling to figure out who's going to take off work/school which days until we can find some sort of respite care or "babysitter."
My cousins then decided to get in on the bullying. They started going on 0248 and other social medias trashing my mom and even my and my siblings (even though we tried to stay out of it--it was a problem between my mom and my aunt and we didn't want to make it worse), then one of my cousins called my mom and started yelling at her for over an hour. Today I stayed home (and will again on Friday) to watch my grandmother, but we're still scrambling to figure out the rest of the week.
Earlier today, my mom emailed me from work telling me that apparently my aunt has started calling extended family members and telling them flat out lies about my mom, and thankfully they were smart enough to call my mom and get her side, but it's still horrible that my aunt is continuing this and bringing more people into it. Then, an hour ago, my aunt sends an email out to my mom, uncles, siblings, and even MY BOYFRIEND (who isn't part of this and she had no right to bring into it) trashing my mom, and my whole family (saying none of us care about her and are abusing her) and making up lies about what's been happening the past few years (and I know for a fact they're lies).
I'm so incredibly mad right now. My aunt is clearly someone different than who I thought she was, which is so sad. I loved her dearly, and my cousins, but they are being so purely evil right now, and they're being so immature. And now it's going to affect my moms work and school (which she needs to be in to get a higher paying job because my dad abandoned us three years ago) and my siblings and i's school (at least for the next two weeks, unless we can't find somewhere for my grandmother to go, in which case i have no clue what we'll do, but it may require my mom or i dropping out of school mid-semester).
Now to the headache: last night i fell asleep with the slight headache. However, in the middle of the night it got so bad it woke me up and I couldn't sleep for hours. I was only an hour after I downed a bunch of pain killers that I was able to finally sleep, but then it came back when I woke up (cue more pain killers) and is now starting to come back again. I fear this may become chronic, and I'm sure it has something to do with all the stress and emotion (add in that I already have really bad abandonment issues and am dealing with the death of another relative).
I need advice. Is this headache something I should be worried about, could it be something serious, or will it eventually go away? It's debilitating...
Any advice on the headache, or on dealing with the situation would be much appreciated. I feel like I'm coming to the end of my emotional rope, and I don't know how much longer I can withstand this kind of pressure (I literally feel like my chest is being crushed). I just don't know what to do...I seriously need help, or I may easily end up somewhere, which my mom does not need right now...