I worry about everything. It makes me so angry that I do this. I am exhausted too.
I worry constantly about my parents. They are both in their 80's and have health issues.
My mother had 2 fourteen hour heart surgeries last year (one in February and one in August).
My father had a stroke a year and a half ago and then 3 yrs ago had a heart attack out of the country.
My father has also had multiple melanoma surgeries.
My sister (19 months younger than I), had a stage 4 cancer that she is now 11 1/2 yrs out of due to a bone marrow transplant.
I have DVT, fibromyalgia (as a result of a car accident 22 yrs ago), chronic fatigue and 2 1/2 yrs ago I went through a summer of hell due to three kidney stone surgeries in an 8 week time.
I should say that I am the oldest of 7 siblings and have always been so concerned about others and very careful about others.
I essentially fell apart once when I was taking an AD. The AD had bad effects on me. I went off right then. I started acupuncture and while that has helped I do not think that it is enough.
I refuse to go on meds. I have been on things and I turn out to be allergic to whatever it is.
I am trying to do better.
I do not feel that I can ever be relaxed. I always feel like I have to be on heightened alert--especially when it comes to my parents.
My husband and I have not gone on a vacation (anywhere--not even to a local place) in over 5 yrs. Part of that is because of finances but when we have had the money we have used it for things that pop up. (a refrigerator that needed to be bought etc).
I know it seems silly and foolish all these worries. I know it just makes things inside of me inflamed and that is not good for me.
I really need to learn to push out some of these worries and get on with life.