I just need to vent! I'm driving myself crazzzzy!

[destiny1]

I can't even believe I've managed somehow for THIS LONG. I barely have my first therapy appointment next week for anxiety ever. N one told me, it never occured to me. I thought anxiety was physical stress, not THIS f****** BS that makes me over analyze everything. I freaking ruin my own life. In an attempt to understand what someone means better I ask a ton of questions, can't resist calling and asking what something EXACTLY means, having friends and family try to help me analyze situations. I get stressed out then have some drinks for relief, then OH BOY, now I'm intoxicated and thinking too much, bet people love THOSE calls from me, ugh. ALL OF THIS IN AN ATTEMPT TO FIX SOMETHING THAT ISN'T EVEN SOMETHING TO BEGIN WITH. THE ONLY THING I ACCOMPLISH IS HUMILIATING MYSELF. EVEN NOW PART OF ME WANTS TO CALL THE PEOPLE I'VE CALLED LATELY TO APOLOGIZE FOR MY DUMB OVERANALYZING CALLS BUT THERE I GO AGAIN MAKING IT AN EVEN BIGGER DEAL. FML.

[bruxby]

yeah, that sounds pretty intense. I hope you are feeling slightly better. But from your post you do seem pretty aware of some the problems that you are currently dealing with and you are actively trying to solve them as best as you can.

take care

[kiddatheart]

Destiny,

Hope you're better today. Just found the post and thought of myself when my anxiety first began. I wanted a solution and I wanted it to stop IMMEDIATELY so I talked myself silly! It is now a year later and many of my friends I have apologized to numerous times for driving them nuts with this. Thankfully they love me and tolerate me. But they don't understand it. Just a thought, find a group support in your area so you have more than just the therapist to talk with. It helps me to talk with others who are experiencing what I am going through. The chat room help has many great, fun, experienced folks on it. They often help me re group when my world is closing in on me. I don't think drinking is a solution. Learning new skills to deal with it, and finding a medication that works, yoga, meditation, eating right, sleep regular is huge, exercise is so important to bring out the right chemicals in your brain to deal with the anxiety, and therapy. Anxiety is not easy, but we can kick it's butt when it creeps into our lives. I thought everything in my life must suck and I am not realizing it because the anxiety is here. But my doctor tells me repeatedly, anxiety is a body chemical reaction and can be brought on by stress but it's like a virus you have it and all you can do it deal with it till it goes. So okay... it's here like a knee ache and I am dealing with it. The more you learn the better to deal.

Remember you have a source of help here on the chat. The folks are terrific. There are different people on at different times of day so check in and find those that fit with you. Welcome!