So frustrating :(

[aeminxmakeup]

Hi I joined this site 2 years ago but haven't been on in a while. I
Have horrible anxiety/ depression and hypochondria! I always think I'm sick or dying
And it prevent me from living a normal life. About a month ago. I had sex with 2 new people. Not in the same time! But too new people. I'm now somewhat dating one of them. This is all new to me bc I was in a relationship
For 6 years before this. I've always thought I had new diseases such as cancer etc. anyway. I have asked both of these guys for my piece of mind to get HIV tests bc  terrified that I have it both did and supposedly both were negative, they must think I'm crazy but I'm so nervous. I mean the chances of them having this are slim... But I've convinced myself that I have it. I've asked my mom to feel my glands she's a nurse and so am I , she says there not swollen but I feel pressure there and  in my ears a little and my armpits hurt. I even feel a dull sore throat. I'm to the point where I rather die than have this. I got tested a week after all this happened it was negative but probobly too soon to find out. Idk what to do I just k ow that if I go to the doctor again they will tell me I have it. I have worried like this about my health for years, I recently started new meds that I thought were working but I've just been feeling worse by the days help me

[marc]

I think the odds of you getting HIV are minimal. As you know, our minds play havoc with our ability to reason and
it takes a while to get some control back.

[floridaguy65]

I have worried like this about my health for years, I recently started new meds that I thought were working but I've just been feeling worse by the days help me

Hi ae:)

I'm not really going to address the HIV thing (other than say I agree with Marc), as it is your overall anxiety issues that drive your struggles, overwhelmingly.

Meds take some time before they can balance out in our system. And, there can be some side effects, perhaps, that can make peeps feel 'off' until we get used to them. That said, meds alone are rarely the path to longterm peace...at the levels we desire. There are other actions and habits (which ultimately heavily influence our mindsets) that offer up tremendous potential in helping us seek out a viable healing path for our mental health challenges.

If you have a scrip for meds, then you see a Doc. What type of Doc? Medical or mental health? Have you ever had some therapy / counseling?

What self help actions do you embrace?

I know it's tough interacting with anxiety disorder / health anxiety. But, we CAN learn how to live very well alongside our trials. Intrusive thoughts are part of our dealings....no way around them, really. But, we can learn how to not react to them out of panicked fear. Through acceptance and pushing through the fearful thoughts, we can, eventually, help ourselves remove a lot of the dominance and tamp down a lot of the panic to where it might be a lot more manageable. From 'managing' our anxiety, we can continue to help ourselves (through our actions and habits) and learn to 'manage' more and the pattern would continue and, hopefully, the PULL ( compulsions) would gradually diminish in their abililty to steer us into bad habits and counterproductive actions. We embrace bad habits and counterprodutive actions as we feel we are 'protecting' ourselves. History and our own experiences, often, have shown us that we, OVERHWLEMINGLY, didn't (and don't) need almost all of these 'protective' measures. Mental health challenges drive this. We CAN learn how to really help ourselves with our mental health challenges. It is tough, exasperating, diligent work (then it can become much more natural and flowing:). We do not have to be dominated by anxiety:)

Peace and Feel Well:)