Do I have a terrible illness or have I succumbed to health anxiety?

[lindsay0891]

Sorry this is so long but I really, really appreciate anyone who reads and gives input!
I just turned 22 and I have been plagued with the craziest symptoms for going on a year. I have had anxiety to some extent all of my life and depression/anxiety sort of run in my family. I've seen about 10 doctors and all of them diagnosed me with anxiety, and most of them said anxiety was responsible for all of my symptoms. But with how debilitating this has been, and how I've never had any of these problems before, I just don't know.
My problems started right after I turned 21, in March of 2012. I started feeling kind of sick to my stomach in the mornings and I was very tired a lot of the time. Thought I could be pregnant, got tested and it was negative.
Then around the beginning of April those symptoms got a little worse, and I kept getting headaches, which was unusual for me. A couple days later I started coming down with a virus, or what I think was a virus. It basically started with dizzy/lightheaded spells and fatigue, progressed to nausea and vomiting, and sharp pains in my ribs and back. I stayed in bed for a week, started feeling better and thought I was going to go back to my life.
Two weeks later the dizzy/lightheaded feelings started coming back, then turned into stomach problems like nausea, vomiting, and no appetite. I started vomiting every morning like clockwork. Nausea would wake me up. I was CONSTANTLY dizzy and lightheaded, thought it was because I wasn't eating, then when I started eating again the feeling stuck.
Some more symptoms appeared... I started getting a very slight weak feeling on the whole left side of my body that was on and off. Then I started getting symptoms like hypoglycemia; even though I was usually nauseous and didn't have much of an appetite I had to eat every couple hours to keep the lightheaded feeling at bay. Sometimes I would be just sitting there and I would get a wave of lightheadedness or just a weird feeling in my head that made me feel like I was going to pass out, but I never actually fainted. Some days I felt much better, other days I felt like I was going to die.
Some of the symptoms faded... the morning vomiting gradually tapered off, and hasn't happened since late September *knock on wood*. The lightheaded feeling isn't AS constant. I thought I was getting gradually better in October - January, then starting in February I started getting worse. Here are my symptoms right now:
-I have to eat CONSTANTLY or I will feel like I'm going to pass out. It's exactly like hypoglycemia, but when I check my blood sugar it's always normal.
-I have a lot of nausea and some IBS-like symptoms, and also gas and bloating. The gas was absolutely awful in late summer/fall, but has gotten slightly better. I was getting gas pains so bad I couldn't move.
-In the past two weeks I have been getting weak feelings in my arms and legs. I had an infection in my finger and thought the weakness/malaise was part of that, then I took antibiotics and it healed and I still feel bad. The weakness has been scaring the crap out of me and making me think I have MS... but it usually only happens when I need to eat, or sometimes right after I eat. Today it happened in a store right after I ate a meal, and I felt lightheaded and just like I was in a daze.
-Sometimes I get slight pains in my ribs and back like when I had that virus, but not nearly as severe.

That's about the extent of it right now. I felt like I was learning to live with it for a while but now it's getting so much worse again. Part of me wants to accept anxiety/panic disorder as a diagnosis because I HAVE had panic attacks during this, my heart rate is always really fast, I went through a lot of emotional stress before this happened, etc. But I don't want to keep thinking that and ignore a more serious problem.

[sixpack]

hello

well you've seen 10 doctors, that is pretty much THE definition of health anxiety   

here is my usual info I send to our newbies:

http://www.anxietyzone.com/index.php/topic,60476.0.html

more information that I often post to people when they've had their thinking taken over by anxiety:

another message I sent to a member a while back may have some helpful info:

it is pretty easy to let the symptoms scare the crap out of you and easy to attribute all manner of horrors to these things.

one of your questions was: "so what, just because you feel these things at least they are not life-threatening",    I would look at like this:  if the symptom actually, physically prevents you from doing things, then you need to look at it as something a doc should check out.  IF it is something like twitching or sore muscles or muscles feel weak or fatigued but they still carry you around then, you should just say "hey this doesn't feel good but it can't stop me from doing my daily tasks or job or hobby or what have you. And say "I will not let my fear of these symptoms stop me".

As I alluded in a post earlier today about my first fall into the pit in '97, I had to do that to get myself out of it.  I had all the med tests and was seeing a therapist.  They wanted to put me on meds but I was nursing my daughter and, at the time, SSRIS were not given to nursing mothers.  I finally decided that I had two choices:  1. sit around in fear waiting for MS (that was my fear at the time) to slowly remove my life from me or 2. TAke charge of this anxiety.  So what I did was delve head first into a huge gardening project.  Turns out it helped a great deal because it REALLY took my mind off of my bodily sensations.  This allowed my mind to calm down and thereby allowed my body to relax.  It wasn't over night.  It took several weeks.  During that time I didn't monitor the symptoms that I had been having NON_STOP for months---ie twitching, face pain, arm pain, leg pain, numbness, tingling, shooting pains, jerking limbs.....   there were many more but you get the idea 

What is your thing?  IDK.  I didn't know gardening was my thing until I tried it.  Turns out I'm damn**  good at it AND it was so engrossing to me that I didn't even have time to think about my symtpoms... which, imo, is key....

I eventually got into some other things:

volunteering.  I got heavy into several things at my church... social responsiblity sorts of things---helping the sick (AIDS person), the poor, those who suffered miscarriages or other woman issues dealing with children.  I also got every envolved with our neighborhoods homeowner's association:  ie the welcome committee, social concerns committee, neighborhood socials (helped with planning parties for the 'hood) and I served on the board.

we've since moved so I'm not so involved where we live presently.  However I do volunteer with a dogrescue...

So my suggestion for things to do are:

hobbies----crafting, gardening, scrapbooking, jewelry making ( I had a douzy of a headache last week that advil didn't help----made a couple of pair of ear-rings and the tension headache went away)
volunteer work..... lots of organizations you could help out in
exercise:  I walk my dog 1 1/2 miles----to 2 miles a day.  today was rainy and I was running my kids all over so not much of a walk today... poor dog
eat right-----yeah I SUCK at this one, myself.  Although I did have a nice shrimp bisque which only had about 300 cal today...


I am not symptom-less.  When I experience anxiety/stress symptoms now, however, I don't look to disease X.  I look at what is going on in my life that is causing them.  At this point you are likely not able to find A stressor.  THis is, inpart, due to the fact that you are in the anxiety cycle of:  fear/stress/symptoms/fear.....  However once you are able to reduce your stress using a variety of tools, your mind will calm down and things will get easier and you will be able to manage this without BEASTY taking you for a ride.

you can get better though, you can.   

   


and again:

   adding to that some other posts to another member a while back:




I certainly don't have all of the answers.

however think about it-------------what causes us pain in our bodies?  I mean what controls how we feel pain?   It is our brain/nerves right?  When we fall and scrape our knee, we feel pain because our nerves send signals to the brain, the brain interprets it and says, "I'm hurt".   This a normal thing.  Our brain interprets stuff and tells the nerves to send a pain signal back to our knee and then we feel the pain.   Our brain and nerves are powerful buggers. 

Let's say there is a bear approaching.............  what happens---- we become hyper aware.  we get the fight or flight so we can survive.  We get all those lovely adrenal surges......  We have to survive.  That is all well and good.

now what happens if we have our thinking go awry?  What happens when we are stressed?  what happens if the stress isn't relieved or realized?  Our brains gets wiggy!!!!  THis causes fight/flight all of the time---sometimes at a high level and sometimes at a lower level.  but doesn't matter really cuz now we are "clicked" on the ON position.  We never are truly relaxed.  Our "fight/flight" brain is always switched on to some extent.  THis leaves a body sensitized----muscles are tight, nerves are over reactive (which causes burning/tingling/buzzing) our organs aren't running optimally (ie digestions slows or speeds up).

when these goes unchecked we get in that cycle of fear-------which came first the chicken or egg? 

bottom line our brains control our bodies.  If our brain is scared or stressed or whatever, it doesn't send out nice calm rational signals to our bodies.  Our bodies don't question the brain.  the brain is THE MASTER.....  Our bodies just react.  That is why the answer to feeling better doesn't come from treating the physical but the mental.

and why do you only have symptoms that come and go?  well some peeps have stuff all the time.  Some have them come and go and some have a combo of the two.  Guess it depends on the individual.





AND





sometimes anxiety symptoms are relieved when one is TRULY occupied.  BUT remember a body has to be relaxed for a while before a body calms down.  So one cannot expect the brain to say----oh I"m working now and I'll just forget that I'm a mess really and give up on the aches and pains."    anxiety doesn't really have an on/off switch.

Personally speaking:

back in '97 I got very involved in gardening.  I mean really involved.  It took about 2 or 3wks working up some new garden beds.  in the end I noticed most of my symptoms were either gone or diminished.  But I had an extended amount of time in which I wasn't monitoring.

I've also had times when I've been stressed and decided----Okay I'm going to get involved in something to get my symptoms to go away.  guess what?  it doesn't work then.  cuz, on some level I'm still monitoring.

a year ago I was having, what I knew were stress/anxiety related headaches.  THey were pretty bad.  Well one day I went to help out at a dog rescue.  I walked 7 or 8 dogs over a period of two hours or so.  When I arrived, I had a headache.  At the end I got in the car and drove away with the realization that the headache was gone.  Within 5 minutes it was back.  YEAH can you believe that.

Had the same sort of thing on Monday with a headache.  took my dog to her training class with a headache... left without one.  believe it or not taking my dog to obedience class relieved it.

I've even had gardening or exercise that has made me more shaky

YES I am a mixed bag of tricks like most people I imagine.


JUST like any physical malady, a mental malady needs REAL time to heal   Unlike a physical malady though, with the mental WE have to make the DECISION to heal by changing our actions/thinking/behavior and continue to work on it even when it is hard.    Personally I believe mental issues are more difficult than getting through physical issues   **although I'm getting pretty SICK of this toe thing I've had probs with since mid may.....  I'm getting tired of changing my usual routines to accomodate it***     



thing is there are no easy do 1, 2, 3 and off you go.  This takes time.  Even more than that, imo, there is no cure to anxiety but more of changing your reactions and mindset.  That doesn't mean one is miserable. It means that one must be cognizant that anxiety can, if allowed, take over during times of stress.  Then all it will do is sit back  and LIE and watch the spin.       


I know a lot of info up there.  I can blather on.....  hope it has some useful info.

[lindsay0891]

Thanks! That was helpful. Some of the symptoms DO keep me from doing things, like working and going to school. The symptoms that mimic hypoglycemia are probably the most debilitating because sometimes I feel like I'll pass out. I feel like it might be from adrenaline going constantly. I need to try to keep it at bay with better diet and more exercise.