anxiety causing paranioa :/

[jax79]

I haven't been on here in a while trying to find other ways to deal with my anxiety and some has helped such as not paying attention to my thoughts and fears, having panic attacks (dealing with them) basically trying to stay positive. I noticed I've become more paranoid. I always feel like someone is out to get me or kill me. If i see guy neighbors starring at me (apartment building) I feel freakish because I feel like their out to get me :/ I know it's ridiculous and I know it's my anxiety causing it but it just gets me. I let my emotions take over and cause this paranoia. I just want to walk outside and not worry that someone is out to get me when clearly there not! I have noone to talk to because they will think im crazy or get mad at me so all I have is you guys! Maybe it's from watching movies with killings in or or tv shows who knows but I dont want to stop watching movies or shows i like because my stupid anxiety! I worry about everything! My health my kids health our safety, dying you name it I worry and I HATE IT! I'm dealing with it day by day and writing my thoughts do help because it shows me how ridiculous i sound. Have anyone ever experience this if so advice if not advice or ways I can deal with this crazyness! Controling our emotions is hard!

[Jlo1019]

Hey Jax, I do the same thing! Especially with all the gun violence lately, I always second guess every stranger at the mall,  grocery store,  everywhere. Writing down your thoughts sounds like a great idea. What a good way to see our thoughts for what they are.

I hope things improve for you :)

[Hijita]

Yes, I can definitely relate! Anytime someone reaches into a pocket my first thought is that it's for a gun, and I used to avoid elevators because I though I was gonna see a dead body . I totally understand, and what helped me was venting all my irrational fears to my man. He laughed and was surprised that I had these fears, but putting them out there and getting his feedback and knowing how silly they sounded helped lessen my fear.

[the happy planner]

Hi Jax... that sound like anxiety to me.  You may really benefit from seeing a therapist who might suggest some Cognitive Behaviour Therapy, which is all about challenging negative thoughts.  You have to work at it, but it might help.

You're not alone in worrying excessively, but you're among friends here... all of us on this board want you to get better and enjoy life, nobody here is out to get you :)

Do think seriously about therapy though... maybe check your medical plan if you've got one to see if that's covered.

[jax79]

Thanks for all your responses everyone! It's good to know I'm not the only one feeling like this. Unfortunately my insurance doesn't cover mental services if they did I would have already seen a therapist. Were trying to switch our insurance so I can see a therapist hopefully soon because I have so many negative thoughts it consumes my life and i hate it. I hide it very well in front of my children because I don't want them to end up like me. I want them to live there lives for the fullest without the fears and negative thoughts. I hope to get the help i need and live a semi-normal life with anxiety. Walking my dog has me worried thinking someone is going to kidnap more or something. So ridiculous I know but my thoughts have deff taking over! Thanks again everyone!

[Jlo1019]

I'm the same way! I was/am nervous to visit a memorial site by my home Bc I'm worried some crazy person might target it and shoot visitors. Boo!

Anyway, I'm in the same position as you too because I have insurance but not great insurance. So that means mental health coverage is minimal.

I'm sorry you are feeling frustrated. I hope you are able to get better insurance soon. In the meantime,  I hope the board helps you get support.

[Fireraiser]

I too hope that you can have your insurance sorted.  I am sure that treatment will help.
There seems to be many people who have paranoia with anxiety, including myself.  Feeling frustrated about it sounds like a "normal" response.  Good job on recognising it, that has to be a positive step.