Don't know what to do with boyfriend anymore...

[Pixels]

I've been with my boyfriend 2 1/2 years now. Our relationship got off to a terrible start.
He has some major issues surrounding jealousy. In the beginning he tried to tell me I dressed like a 0107,
he said I was staring at other men, seeking attention, he thought I was talking to people online,
If i got a txt he would immediately be near my phone to see who it was. He even went so far as to
look at my personal documents on a hard drive. He got mad at me for a chat I had maybe 4-5 years before when I was 18. All of his accusations were untrue and I've been completely faithful.

He feels this way (apparently) because his mother and step father had a messy divorce after his mother cheated.
Then his last girlfriend cheated on him. He also had a bit of a traumatic childhood. He told me about it but he resents me for it. He said I made him tell me, and now he makes me feel bad about it.

I feel like he pushes my friends away but he says that he doesn't. For the past year or two I've talked to almost nobody but him and my family. Whenever we fight (which is often) I feel so lost and alone.
I got him to agree to see a psychiatrist with me. But that was last year and now that I try to get him to go he said I never tried and it's too late.

I'm a bit lost what to do. Our lives are so entangled. We live together and he's being apprenticed under my father. I love him but he has a mean and malicious streak to him. Whenever he gets mad I get so depressed I'm afraid of hurting myself (and I've never hurt myself before meeting him, but I have several times after meeting him).

Is there hope for us or have I just gotten myself into something that will make me and my "condition" much worse?

[Birch531]

What do you mean that you hurt yourself? That is very serious. It's very common to stay in a relationship because it's what you're used to, it's comfortable in that you've been with the person for a long time, ties have been made (like the apprenticeship), etc. But I have to be honest - it sounds like you need to get out. It would be a very scary thing to end a relationship that has gone on for so long, but do you really see yourself marrying this guy? If you don't, then it would be better to get out now. Self-harm is no petty matter. If he's the trigger for you to do that to yourself, he's bad news.

[Runner88]

Have you talked with him about how you feel? It may really open his eyes or may be able to see what he does to you when he feels that way?
Do you feel confident in yourself? I know I was more like your boyfriend and jealous and insecure with myself. I just want you to reach into your heart and see if this guy is really what you see yourself with the rest of your life... if it is, ask if it's worth it to ask for a break for yourself and for him? Paths get entangled (mine are and it sucks) but all parties should understand if it's best for you, and maybe for him in the long run.