Recently this girl down the hall from me in the student dorms has invited me over a handful of times, both with other people and alone aswell.
A few weeks ago, kind of in the middle of her starting to invite me over alone, we were at a party together and were dancing and we made out a bit. After dancing she was holding my hand and holding me like I was her boyfriend - which kind of bothered me.
Right now, I just dont want to be bothered with seeing a girl. Part of it has to do with the pressure of having sex and all that jazz, which I am not that comfortable with (story in it's own), plus the fact that I like relaxing with my roommates after class and playing xbox, training MMA, doing what I want. I don't want a girl to deal with that I am obligated to hang out with a few times a week and text and keep happy, etc..
I've been over to her room a few times now, and we cuddled and made out one of the times and it was nice.. but I knew I was kind of leading her on. Lately I hung out with her again for a bit, but didn't show any interest in touching her or kissing her - and I could tell she was kind of confused and upset. This was thursday afternoon, and I havent talked or texted her since then. My gut tells me to just tell her I don't want this kind of relationship with anyone right now and I just wanna worry about me, but my anxiety ridden mind keeps telling me that this will upset her and cause her to feel bad about herself, and blame herself.
My biggest problem is how I am going to deal with this. I don't know how to word my dis-interest in an intimate relationship without making her feel bad about herself and most likely make things very awkward between us - seeing as we live on the same floor
I kind of got sucked in and have just been going along with her requests and suggestions all along, which I regret but I don't really think it could have been avoided.. I tend to go along with whatever people want a lot.
Any suggestions or opinions will help, regardless if you agree with my position or if you think I should take a different approach/mindset. She is a really nice girl and I don't want to hurt her, by leading her on or even just telling her i don't want this.