Worst six months of my life.

[Roseline1982]

I'm going to try to make this brief as possible.  I've suffered from panic attacks and a phobia of fainting in public since I was about 13.  For many years I was medicated (Paxil, Lexapro, Pristiq, Venlafaxine) and found the greatest efficacy from Venlafaxine.  By April of 2012 I felt so panic-free and confident that I decided to wean myself off of it.  Even after getting off of it, I still felt great.  In August of 2012 I decided to move from a small town in Kansas to NYC.  After two weeks of being there, the panic attacks started up again.  At first they were short and manageable, but then they got worse and gradually led to agoraphobia.  Obviously, NYC is not the best place for an agoraphobic and I decided to move back to Kansas thinking that it would eliminate all my panic symptoms.  Unfortunately, it did not.  It has only worsened.  I'm anxious almost all day every day and still have occasional panic attacks.  I have been exercising daily, eating right, drinking in moderation, and going to therapy for three months now with no positive results.  I'm considering going back on Venlafaxine but I'm worried the first week or two will drive me insane.  Should I just dive in?

[floridaguy65]

I have been exercising daily, eating right, drinking in moderation, and going to therapy for three months now with no positive results. 

I would definitely continue with the above. You were doing well, as you said, before you moved to NYC. To me, there is no reason why you can't get yourself back into a better place again. Moving from Kansas to NYC was a big experience...traumatic even maybe. Perhaps you just weren't quite far enough down your healing path to make such a move into the city that never sleeps:) Certainly keep exercising and going to therapy. Are you doing well with your counselor / therapist?

I'm considering going back on Venlafaxine but I'm worried the first week or two will drive me insane.  Should I just dive in? Tough to tell someone to take a med....as it is a very personal decision. Meds have helped many (as you know)....many have been able to move away from them and continue on their healing path having embraced and had some successes with all the other actions and habits that can help us with anxiety and panic disorder. What is your therapist saying about meds?

I think you are likely being hard on yourself, as well, as you are feeling like your move to NYC was a huge failure and that you'll never be able to live without being hounded by anxiety / panic. Compassion is key. Don't let compassion lead you to justifications though - and avoidance mechanisms too often. Acceptance is key, also. We have to accept that our challenges are likely lifetime trials. But, this can be more than OK, as we can learn how to live so very well alongside our mental health challenges. You've had periods where you felt 'great', as you said. To me, this is still attainable once again, of course. And it can be attainable and long lasting, too...to the extents that we can remain cognizant (and practice) in what we need to do (our self-help work) to stay firmer on a longerterm healing path. Setbacks happen...no way around them. Do not let them make you believe that you cannot get back to positivity and feel well once again:)

Do you practice deep diaphragmatic breathing exercises daily? Do you use affirmations? Visualizations / light meditation? Deep meditation? Journaling? Stretching / Yoga techniques? I know you said you exercise. Again, keep this up...it is vital:)

Peace and Feel Well:)

[Pippy187]

I'm with Florida guy on this one... Try other options before meds, you may find it helpful... I do a lot of journaling and sketching. Exercise is so important as well. I never try to deviate from my routine even when life feels fake I keep at it.

[Roseline1982]

Thanks guys.  I might try to add yoga to the routine.  I heard it does great things.

[Pippy187]

I hear a lot of good about yoga as well keep us posted :)

[MiniShopaholic]

Hi Roseline...
Well, seems like I am having the same issues as you! Am Agoraphobic as well, sometimes I don't want to meet any people.
When my panic attacks me, I used to be so moody and grumpy and I feel I am becoming arrogant 
It is a bit complex.... And recently it getting worst, I avoided coming to the office just because I don't want to meet people on that particular day.

But yeah, I think u can try Yoga... Idk for me, I don't like exercise :p But exercise is important and can make you feel better about yourself.
For me personally, I've never tried medication but you can try Venlafaxine again if it can mitigate your panic attacks, at least it won't be as bad, right?

And, may I know what is the possible reason that lead you to struggle with agoraphobia and panic attacks? Should be a reason for this.
Good luck for both of us. Tomorrow going to office again... I'm like so scared >.<