scared to eat but still do it anyway?

[kutzu]

Ok before I explain about my little dillema I will first state that I have anxiety(of course) severe depression, undiagnosed bipolar ( it runs in my family and I'm pretty sure I have it) and I developed an eating disorder back in the summer of 2011 I lost weight but not enough to be accepted at a clinic for those with eating disorders. As I been told.
So I had to manage myself and at the end of 2012 I actually was able to make myself eat more and not feel as bad as I usually did about gaining weeight. Now a thought popped up in my head just recently, and I mean very recently like 2 days ago. And now I'm dwelling on it. Its the fear if eating too much, like  the fear I'm always going to be hungry and I start to  believe I actually am even though I probably just ate and am full. Granted I barely even go over the recomended 1200 cals a day limit. But it seems like I started worrying about this when I told myself I was going to stop eating at 7 every night., and that. Lasted for like two days until this thought got created. So yeah its been driving  me  crazy and reving myy anxiety to where  food is  on my mind. 24/7. I'm scared but. At the same time I love food and eating. Its just the weight gain and. Diseases like  diabetes that are freaking me out.

[lcfrogs]

Hi 

I have had an eating disorder for 10 years. First I was bulimic, then anorexic, and now I am diagnosed as EDNOS because I am doing well in recovery. I have lived in many treatment centers since 2006, with some treatment before that.

In my experience with being in treatment, I have learned that my anxiety is the biggest cause of my eating disorder. With that said, I have also learned that not eating enough will cause more anxiety about food and everything else.

How old are you? I do not think you are eating enough. I have extensive knowledge about proper nutrition from seeing so many dietitians over the years, and I know that women need at least 1800 calories a day in order to maintain body weight...a little less than that if you are short.

Consuming 1200 calories a day restricts your body of necessary calories to function. Most women's basal metabolic rate (BMR, which means the amount of calories your body burns when you are basically a human vegetable), is between 1400-1600 calories. That means that you need to consume MORE calories than that minimum in order to perform daily functions such as walking, brushing your teeth, or even sitting.

Furthermore, as I said before, restricting your calories increases your anxiety and makes you more fearful of food. There was a study done post-WWII to study the effects of malnutrition on the brain and body. Many men were studied and told to eat only half the amount of calories of what they are supposed to consume per day. This was done over a course of several weeks. By the end of the study, many men had developed an eating disorder or at least a severe obsession with food. None of these men had had eating disorders in the past. They developed a fear of food and some men became bulimic. If they were only obsessed about food, they would constantly talk to one another about food and look at cookbooks. In conclusion, malnutrition has a direct link to the symptoms of an eating disorder.

The study is called "The Minnesota Starvation Experiment" by Ancel Keys. You can read a summary of it here:

http://www.eatingdisordersreview.com/nl/nl_edt_7_3_2.html

You can also google it to learn even more about it.

I have experienced the severe effects of an eating disorder first hand and I am also majoring in Psychology, so I have extensive knowledge about this subject. Trust me, you need to eat more...please heed my advice.

I hope this helped!