Melanoma Anxiety - Keeping it in Check...

[Hohum]

Normally I like to be the voice of reason when I post here, but of course I wouldn't be here at all if I didn't have my own health anxiety battles!

I've actually had several great anxiety-free months recently. I have been working hard to find something which works for me in combating my anxieties. A clean bill of health following medical diagnosis certainly does the trick, but it's not a permanent fix. It resolves one issue until the next one comes up.

Recently I spotted a new mole on my foot - it just sort of "popped up" on me. This was a month ago, and it hasn't changed or gotten any bigger. It did spark off a bit of self-checking of the rest of my skin though (which I'm ashamed to say I have never really bothered with before). I have several atypical moles which I've had for years, but one right in the middle of my back had a couple of very small dark spots in it. Perhaps it's always been like that, or maybe it's new. Rather than freak out about it I just called my family doc and will get it checked out. Heading in for my appointment in an hour or so, and I am basically venting into this post to try and quell my anxiety!! 

[Hohum]

Well appointment went as expected - referred to a dermatologist as my family doc said (and I quote) - "the mole has some of the hallmarks of something more serious, but very often these things turn out to be benign atypical moles. Either way it can't be diagnosed here, so you need to see a specialist". I'm getting an urgent referral which should hopefully mean my follow-up is in 1-2 weeks. Great news as I was expecting 1-2 months!!

Trying to keep a lid on my HA and actually succeeding very well right now. The fact that I am doing all that I can to identify what this thing is and deal with it if it's something to be worried about is reassuring. No amount of worry will change that!

[SighNoMore]

Thanks for keeping us posted! Hopefully you get in soon and get good news! Please keep us posted! I see a derm every 6-8 months because I have TONS of moles and several are atypical. I know it is hard to keep HA in check during these times, but good for you getting things checked!

[marc]

I wish there was something I could tell you not to worry, but a client of mine who is a
psychologist said that most of us are programmed to worry.

[PennyPanic]

I went through this very recently and it turned out to be a benign mildly dysplastic nevus.  I went in for something else and the surgeon found it on my back and removed it.  I was tortured for about 2 weeks waiting for the results.  Now I am insisting on a full skin check and that is next week.  So I feel for you.  BUT as many told me, the far far far majority of these things turn out to be benign.  You are wise and responsible so you are getting it taken care of.  Plus who wants some ugly old mole anyway, right?

Please do keep us posted and try not to worry (easier said than done and I need to take my own advice).

Hang in there.

[Hohum]

Thanks for the kind words of support all.

I had a phone call this afternoon from a Dermatologist and they're getting me in next Tuesday (22nd Jan) PM in a cancellation slot. Three cheers for the Canadian health service!! Sooner I can get in and get this thing off my body, the better!!!

[SighNoMore]

Oh good!! So glad you are getting in quickly! Let us know how the visit goes!

[Hohum]

Well my dermatologist appointment is in an hour or so. Anxiety has been up and down over the last week, but pretty good for the most part. Trying to apply several of the relaxation and "reality check" techniques I have found to work in the past, to this situation, and it's working fairly well. Whenever I find myself feeling a bit freaked out I just remind myself that all I have is some weird physical lesion. I don't know what it is, and am not going to play doctor trying to guess as I don't have the knowledge, training or experience. That's what the specialist is for!

Will post a follow-up after the appointment! 

[mollyfin]

Good luck!  I'm sure it'll all be fine.

[bertybotts]

Good luck!!! I went to the derm yesterday. I passed the skin test with flying colors :D

[PennyPanic]

Bertybotts that is so awesome!

Hohum, you are very brave and I am learning from you and gaining strength from your bravery.  Thank you for sharing your experience with us...it helps us all.

[Hohum]

Well I waited an hour for the appointment and it took around 5 minutes.

She eye-balled the mole for about 5 seconds and said that it was an atypical mole, but because there were a few tiny darker spots in it, it should come off. She then did a shave biopsy, put a band-aid on it and told me not to expect her call. In her own words she would be "absolutely shocked" if this turned out to be a melanoma.

At first I felt a little bewildered as I felt as though I'd been waiting an hour to be shot out of a cannon, so-to-speak! (they really don't hang around, that's for sure!)  To be honest though, this dermatologist is experienced and highly recommended. I'm sure she sees thousands of moles in a month. I did ask why she had done a shave rather than excisional removal, and in her words the likelihood was "so low" of anything more than a benign mole, that it wasn't worth the scar. I guess I can appreciate that, as I am very low-risk for melanoma.

I feel pretty good though, overall. Usually I am a bag of nerves waiting for test results, but this time I am trying to take it easy and not worry so much. Myself and my wife have vacation at the end of next week, so I'm focussing on that. I really find it helps to remember all the things which make life great and worth living, rather than getting so lost in the negatives! 

[PennyPanic]

Well done, Hohum well done!  Keep us posted on the results and I'm sending good prayers and thoughts your way.  You are an inspiration on how to handle these things.

Meanwhile, I've been told by many that the specialists really do know if there is an issue.  So it all sounds super excellent!

God bless and good health.

[bertybotts]

I asked my derm about a mole that is less than 1 mm and he looked and said "nope, nothing." Didn't even wanna biopsy. Why bother? It's gonna cause a big ugly scar.

Believe them - they are EXPERTS. not just experts-- they get sued if they screw up! So if you had cancer, and she just said "naw, no cancer here, go home" and it actually was cancer, she could get into a pile of legal trouble.
Believe her, for sure. Her career is on the line with that decision. If she says it ain't cancer, it really isn't! ;)

Try to relax!!!