When even legitimate health fears are put to rest

[vardnas]

Hello, all my darling hypochondriacs ... I just wanted to share with you my recent experience.

Back in September I started experiencing strange (for me) discharge in between my periods, plus some discomfort in the pelvic region. I kept an eye on it and it persisted until finally in December it was so bad that I was bleeding in between periods. Not a lot, but enough to spur me to find a gynecologist and make an appointment. She did an exam and didn't see/feel anything out of the ordinary, but ordered a transvaginal ultrasound and some blood work anyway. She had tested my FSH and free T3 and T4, plus prolactin and estradiol. All of this was paid for out of pocket by the way, because I don't currently have insurance.

I got my tests done, and through it all I'm thinking maybe I have a cyst or endomitriosis. Something, I'm sure, must show up. After all, I didn't panic and run to the doctor; I waited like a good patient should and didn't freak out. Well, I went back today for a follow-up, and my doc informs me that EVERYTHING came back normal. EVERYTHING. So she asks me what I want to do and suggests that watchful waiting is the best approach, because she doesn't think I need birth control ('cause of the normal hormone levels) and she'd be willing to do a uterine biopsy, but given my age (32) and lack of any other risk factors (obesity, diabetes, high blood pressure) she seriously doubts anything is going on and wants to spare me the invasive procedure.

So, there you go. Even after having done everything "right," I still feel like I wasted a lot of time and money to prove there was nothing wrong with me. I just wanted to share this with you all to make a point that even though strange things can go on in our bodies, it doesn't mean there's anything clinically "wrong" with us. It's not always because of something "sinister," it just is what it is. Bodies are weird. Yet they are INTRICATELY designed and work with the purpose of homeostasis in mind. When something goes wrong in our bodies, they have ways of SELF CORRECTING and healing themselves that are far more amazing than even the most advanced medicine. I firmly believe that our bodies have CLEAR ways of telling us when things are going wrong, and until we get these clear signals, then there is nothing to really worry about.

Keep on fighting the good fight, y'all. 

[greend]

In addition to what you've said, I went to a neurologist last year and told him that one of the symptoms I was experiencing was really annoying and his reply to me was 'just because something is annoying, doesn't make it a disease'.  I thought about that and I guess he's right.

Glad you are fine.

[floridaguy65]

Nice post, V...thanks for sharing:)

Bodies are weird. Yet they are INTRICATELY designed and work with the purpose of homeostasis in mind. When something goes wrong in our bodies, they have ways of SELF CORRECTING and healing themselves that are far more amazing than even the most advanced medicine. I firmly believe that our bodies have CLEAR ways of telling us when things are going wrong, and until we get these clear signals, then there is nothing to really worry about.

To me, the above is undeniable. But, I know how when we are struggling with HA we DO deny this, most often. HA peeps are worried that we won't be able 'to tell'. That it will be 'too late'...hence we must be hyper-vigilant, as our anxious minds tell us. So we get everything checked out and seek out continued reassurances which, ultimately, leads to amped up anxiety and lifeflow interruptions. Through our tremendously bad habit of scouring the internet looking for 'facts' to back up our fear (confirmation bias), we fuel our fear cycles. "You see. People DO get colon cancer in their 20's! I knew it! OMG, this cramping and loose stools are a definite sign of colon cancer. It says so RIGHT HERE on this website. I can't die now...I will miss out on soooooo much in life.", etc.

My criteria for seeking out medical intervention has been redefined, certainly, from when I struggled mightily. Other than my yearly physical, skin check and dental visit, I would truly have to be nearly incapacitated to go to any type of Doc. I stick to my medical accepted time table for medical screenings, dependant upon my age (47 now) and my family and personal history. I am due for a colonoscopy this year (5 years from my last). I had a first cousin die of a rare type of colon cancer when he was 40. So, because I have had IBS and bowel 'stuff' for years and because of my cousin, the Doc wanted me to have a colonoscopy at 40. I did. They found one polyp (and removed it). Likely, it wold have never developed into anything. But, because they found a polyp, I was told to have another in two years (age 42), which I did. All Clear. So now I am told to go very five years for a colonoscopy, which I will do...and NOTHING more. I have a history of dysplastic nevi...I've had several wide excisions to go back in and get clean margins. So, I go to the Derm once a year (and I know how to check myself, and I do once every two months, and I taught my wife what to look for, so I have a 'non HA' voice, too:) And I will do nothing more. Aside from that, I simply will not go to the Doc unless it is DRASTIC. A fever of 102 from the flu is not drastic. I niggling pain in my side (which I have pretty much all the time, lately) is not drastic. A series of PVCs, which I can still get, isn't drastic. My wanting to have a full body scan (which still happens at times, I must admit:) doesn't qualify....LOL:)

My body has 'healed itself', pretty much, from all that has come its way, so far. And through me being diligent in maintaining my medical protocol (and nothing more), I have accepted that there is nothing else I can do. All else falls into seeking out inappropriate reassurances, which would fuel HA / Anxiety / Panic. I know my actions and habits are what matter most in my lifetime journey with anxiety....and then my mindsets have a chance to come along for the good stuff, too.

And, with an overall healthy, moderate diet and with diligent, continued exercise (without becoming obsessive...there is a line:), I know that I am doing ALL that I can for my body and my physical health. So, now that I have my bod taken care of, so to speak, I can continue to keep helping my mental health be as vibrant as I can make it. It's work, sure....but that work has become very natural and self-affirming in its ability to keep me truckin':)

Overwhelmingly our bodies are not failing us. Overwhelmingly, we need to be active and embrace the wonderful gift of life and tax our bodies and explore its bounderies. Anxiety makes us feel 'fragile'. We are not - I assure you. Take a leap of faith and move away from the counterproductive actions and habits that feed this faulty notion. Our bodies are incredible machines. Sure, they will ache with soreness from vigorous use and they will react, when illness is there. Our bods will give us niggling pain from bad posture and lack of muscle tone and flexibility. It will let us know our diet isn't he best. It will let us know if we drink too much, etc. Our bodies are absolutely amazing. We need to try to 'rewire' our minds that are bodies are a blessing and NOT a curse or something that is going to fail us - or doom us.

Anxiety is a 'mindgame', so majorly. Treat our bodies well - this is a must. And then work on our minds - our perceptions - our thought processes. This is done through our actions and habits (self help, ultimately:) Taking a med (if you go that route) is an action. Seeking couseling / therapy is an action. NOT doing these things is an action, in the end, too. There needs to be looking into ALL actions and habits when detemining what the best path is for us learn how to live well alongside our anxiety issues:)

Peace and Feel Well:)

[vardnas]

Aside from that, I simply will not go to the Doc unless it is DRASTIC. A fever of 102 from the flu is not drastic. I niggling pain in my side (which I have pretty much all the time, lately) is not drastic. A series of PVCs, which I can still get, isn't drastic. My wanting to have a full body scan (which still happens at times, I must admit:) doesn't qualify....LOL:)

HA! I had to laugh at this, I am the exact same way. That was one aspect of recovery that really helped me get over my acute panic last year—I told myself I would no longer go to the ER unless I was completely incapacitated and unable to make the decision myself. It helped. I never went back. And now with the doctor, it was only after symptoms persisted for so long and even then there was much hemming and hawing.

[gcalex]

FG a great post as always.  I would quibble with you on one point -- lots of recent research suggests that bad posture does not cause pain, contrary to the dogma of chiropractors (ugh, a whole 'nother topic) and physical therapists.  Pain, too, aside from injury, is mostly generated by the mind -- see the work of Dr. John Sarno and others.

[kcg13]

Vardnas, floridaguy -  thank you so much for sharing.  I truly appreciate reading these.  Vardnas - so glad it is an all clear :)

[floridaguy65]

I would quibble with you on one point -- lots of recent research suggests that bad posture does not cause pain, contrary to the dogma of chiropractors (ugh, a whole 'nother topic) and physical therapists.

You would know better then me, likely, about recent research, G:) Let say, then, bad sitting positions (and lack of activity) while frozen in front of the computer while frantically trying to 'find out what in the heck is going on in our bods and minds'. More appropriate description for us, indeed:)

Peace:)

[gcalex]

Even then, I would say pain is from stress, not the sitting position per se. 

[gridder]

Great post! Thanks.

[Daisy55]

As I can relate to the torment of HA myself, I thank you for the posts. Our bodies go through changes and reactions  that readjust and heal themselves.  What they are designed to do.  I need to remember that every day.

[DizzyKangaroo]

I just wanted to share this with you all to make a point that even though strange things can go on in our bodies, it doesn't mean there's anything clinically "wrong" with us. It's not always because of something "sinister," it just is what it is. Bodies are weird.

So very true, and so very hard to remember as a hypochondriac! My BF once told me his father, who is a doctor, told him that the human body is weird and sometimes it'll do something strange, but that doesn't always mean it's something bad. Of course, the problem is distinguishing the difference between what's real and what's anxiety, which can be hard to do! 

[SighNoMore]

I have the notion that if I am truly healthy I won't have any bodily issues. I have to remember that is not true, and just because I do have an issue doesn't mean it is something dire. Thanks for this post! Glad you got the all clear, Vardnas!!