I live in Wisconsin. This time of year has always been very hard on me. The rush of the holidays is over...and now I'm just faced with the long, cold and dark months ahead. I guess you could call it "cabin fever" but my toughest days have always been during the months of January through March. There is something about being stuck inside. I leave for work in the morning when it's dark...and when I leave to come home it's dark. I do not sit near a window at work. The fake lights really mess with my head...and the cold weather outside does not leave much opportunity for exercise outdoors (in warmer months...I'm outside as much as I can).
I've been trying light therapy and Vitamin D supplements this year. I think they're helping a bit. I also see my therapist on a more regular basis. I should mention that I'm better right now than I've been in years past. I am trying to be proactive...rather than reactive.
It just seems like my HA starts out in early winter and it is hard to get past. It just builds upon itself and it grows and grows and grows. Here is an example of my current status: I noticed a perceived "weakness" in my hands, wrists and forearms just over a month ago. I say perceived because I do not think it's actually limited my ability to do anything...I just feel this weakness. I type nearly nine hours a day, however, so I do have a logical explanation for it (if I chose to believe it). This weakness caused me to start thinking about some neurological disease (MS, ALS, etc). I then became obsessed with a tightness/weakness in my right calf muscle. It's a sensation that I know I've felt before (multiple times, I think)...but now I could tie it into the arm weakness. My next concern was that I started to obsess that vision in my left eye was worse then the vision in my right. This is most noticeable when I'm wearing my contacts. Now, I know my vision in my left eye is a tick worse than my right. It's not enough to warrant a different prescription...but it is worse. I, of course, have tied this into the other two concerns. The most recent "symptom" I've added is that I suddenly decided that my speech sounded "thick" on Saturday morning...like I was struggling to say my "th" sounds and my "s" sounds. I've bundled all of these together to reinforce my initial concern and it just gets stronger and stronger.
I know the chance of it all "being in my head" high. I've been down this road so many times before...but I feel powerless to stop it.
It gets to the point where it really does effect my life because it takes so much joy away from the things I should be enjoying. It becomes an obsession. I start to self-test myself...and that then becomes an obsession in itself. It's nuts.