So I'm basically asking if everyone thinks what I'm experiencing is just anxiety and maybe even other people who have blood sugar problems or diabetes can kind of ease my irrational fears.
I'm kind of obsessed with hypoglycemia. It's a phobia, basically. About a year ago I read about hypoglycemia in a book and it just sort of dawned on me that that was me. I had those symptoms and I had ever since I was a child. I always knew I was a child that "had to eat frequently" or "got sick if I didn't have a meal" or whatnot, but it never occurred to me until I read this that that was even a real thing. So this past March I went to the doctor and I explained it and she seemed pretty nonchalant about it and was like "you probably do have it" and went on about making sure to eat protein with my meals and have snacks. She added a glucose panel or something to my normal blood work and the first time I couldn't make it all the way to the center (it was fasting) without eating. I don't know if I just freaked out from anxiety or if I was legit having hypoglycemia. So I had the test redone the following week and I made sure to eat a lot of nuts and protein before bed the following night and my fast blood sugar came back as 80 something. However, I didn't feel bad at all that morning, not like the week before.
So anyway I was okay for a few months and then I got under stress from college this past november and I've had a bad relapse in my anxiety. I'm back to having it pretty much everyday and some days it's just almost endless. It's just every little thing and I've become a bit agoraphobic. However, now everything is centered really on this whole blood sugar thing. I'm always scared my blood sugar is dropping or sometimes I get scared that it's too high (even though I'm not diabetic). I swear I've eaten so much more than normal just because I freak out and think my blood sugar is dropping whenever I start getting anxious. Also, whenever I throw up (which can happen a lot if I wake up with morning anxiety) then I get scared because I just lost my meal so how is my blood sugar going to stay up when I lost my food.
Now we're visiting family and we went out today and ate at a restaurant at around 2pm. I had grilled chicken breast, mashed potatoes, and macaroni and cheese. I kept snacking on everything even after we got home until 7 when we ate and I felt really bad before we ate. I felt shakey and irritated and all that. I don't feel like I could have been hypoglycemic because I'd just eaten a cookie and I'd had chips and chex mix and stuff like that. No one else seemed that hungry and they hadn't even really snacked much since we got home. I feel like I only feel good after I eat a full meal. Is this just psychological?
I don't know. I feel like I sound like a nut, haha. I don't even know why I'm so super scared because the times I genuinely feel like I have experienced hypoglycemia I was all right. I went and got food and I continued on with my day. Whereas now I feel like I'm almost consistently going hypoglycemic. The doctor even told me that most people who aren't diabetic even if they have hypoglycemia rarely faint or have any other serious issue, but somehow that doesn't ease my mind enough to calm it. I know that anxiety has similar symptoms to hypoglycemia and I guess I just can't tell them apart. I even went and talked to the doctor about it, told her I had this anxiety - blood sugar relation and she just said that once you eat your blood sugar is usually good for around 3 or 4 hours. I try to keep that in mind but that doesn't seem 100 percent right to me. I've been debating on buying the kit and strips just to test myself but I've avoided it because I'm trying to not feed my anxiety.
I guess I'm just at my end and I'm so tired of worrying about this. I feel like I'm trying to control my subconscious brain's job and not to mention I've gained 7 lbs so far just by always stuffing myself to avoid a blood sugar low. I just want to know if other people believe this is just an anxiety reaction or what. I'm not even sure I know if I'm hungry or not or if my stomach is just overfilled with acid. I also get concerned maybe it's a thyroid issue and since it was all the way in March since I had blood work maybe it's different now because that's like 10 months. Even as I type this I'm a bit shaky and thinking about whether or not the macaroni and cheese had enough protein and fat to last me for a while before I need to eat again.
I don't know guys, I'm so tired about worrying about all of this yet I don't know how to quiet my mind or put it at peace. Thank you for taking the time to read my lengthy post. :)