Does anyone else experience extreme panic and fear of going to the doctor?

[laura124]

The months of November and December have been especially trying for me this year.  I caught a really bad cold in November (early-mid) with laryngitis (complete loss of voice).  I continued to take care of myself and exercise during this time.  I really didn't cough THAT much during the time I was sick but then about 5 days after I got my voice back and felt completely recovered, I developed a tickley cough that I just can't get rid of.  I can feel thick mucus in my throat and sometimes mucus will come up.  I have tried a course of antibiotics and Zantac 150 twice a day, in case it's GERD with really no difference.  The weird thing is that some days it's better than other days and when I'm completely relaxed the tickle stops.  I don't cough at all when I fall asleep.  It makes no sense.  Before the onset of this November virus I NEVER coughed ever.

Now, I'm worried and annoyed of this tickle and I just want to be normal and healthy. I feel normal otherwise, no fatigue or excessive tiredness.  I did experience chest pain/heaviness but that has subsided.  I don't google because of my HA but I already know way too many medical anomalies than anyone with anxiety should be allowed to know.

Everyone is telling me to go to the doctor and get an exam or chest xray and blood work but I'm beyond afraid to go.  I feel like what if they tell me that I have something terminal.  Just the thought of going now sends me into panic mode.  So bad that I'm shaking writing this and even thinking about going.  I know I'm going to have to beat this and eventually go--I'm 45 and need a mammogram and a just a basic physical.  I'm just not there yet. I was always a little scared to go to the doctor but the need for reassurance always out weighed the anxiety of going.  But now it has spiraled into a full blown phobia!

I'm so scared that I could have something bad with this cough that I'm really depressed. I want to get into therapy ASAP but don't want to just pick a therapist out of the yellow pages.  I just don't know who to ask.  I know something has to change in my life this year.  I wondered if anyone else with HA has developed this phobia?  It kinda sounds like the majority have no problem with going to the doctor!

[e77]

I have a similar problem laura124.  I take a half of a klonopin tablet and walk a lot prior to the appointment, need to keep moving as I don't like waiting in the lobby.  My blood pressure spikes every time.  What helps a little is to be open with the medical personnel that you are anxious, most are understanding.  I know how difficult it can be but I talk myself into going to get medical treatment as I know, in the end, that it will help long term. Hang in there.

[CallMeAl]

I have to go back in about two weeks and I am already working myself in to a state over it.  The Dr wants to see how the meds for suspected GERD are working. I get  myself so worked up that I have taken to writing everything down  and just handing it to the Dr as I got sick and tired of just sitting in her office and crying.  I have the same symptoms as you Laura, sinus issues  along with digestive crap going on too. Christmas Day was a write off for me as I was just a wreck. I too am longing for a normal, healthy life.

[mollyfin]

Yes, the worse my HA has gotten, I've developed doctor fears...I now get extremely nervous going to the doctor's when I never used to.  The frustrating thing is, I NEED to see a doctor to get a test done (had irregular pap last year; hopefully nothing, but they need to recheck every six months), and I can't do it!  But all those completely useless tests...sure, those were no problem.  Figures! 

I usually try to schedule my appointments for early in the day so I don't have to worry about them all day.  Usually they're not nearly as bad as I fear, so I have the rest of the day to enjoy.

[tamig41]

Hi Laura 124,  I know what you are talking about.  I hate going to the doctors!!!  That is one of my main fears is going to the doctors.  I try to avoid at all costs not to go.  I have to drag myself there!  I think if you take little small steps to the doctor your fear of going will get better.  I go every year for the annual mammogram.  I also go every year for the physical.  It has taken me a while to build myself up to going but I have done it and feel better about going than not.  Again, it has taken me time to get the courage up to go but I have and every year I will go for my screening tests.  I am 48 and I know it is in my best interest to do so.  I am also a mother of a teenage daughter and I want her to see me go so she will continue to go when she is out on her own.  I always treat myself to a little shopping spree afterwards.  I have also gone with a friend to get a mammogram done then we go treat ourselves to lunch and a little special treat!  I think what you have my husband is getting over because it sounds very similar to what you have described and so is one of my best friends.  The annoying tickle cough.  I know it can last for a while.  Give it some time and I am sure your cough will go away.  Seems like coughs are the last symptom to go!  Hope this helps!!!

[laura124]

Thanks for the replies, its nice to know I'm not alone!  I think I might have to take an Ativan before going for sure.  I know if I just face my fears, in the long run some of this anxiety will disappear.  It's true that after you go, you feel so relieved.  I was watching E's biography of Guliana Rancic and she was talking about when the doctor told her that she had  breast cancer.  She said one minute your happy and living your life and focusing on your marriage and career and then in a minute your world is turned upside down because your doctor is saying "Im sorry, you have breast cancer".  That's so scary.  I know I'm not thinking rationally but I just couldn't take that.  I also worry so much about my daughter that's away at college and my son that drives around everywhere.  Again, nothing related to health but Godforbid I ever had to get the call that something happened to my kids. I could cry just typing the thought.  So, I really need to get my anxiety under control so I can have my life back.  I feel like everyday I just float by doing what I have to do but the weight on my shoulders so heavy.

[evagisele]

I haven't been to the doctor in years. I have an appt. with a GP on 1/9/12. I had a complete HA meltdown over my recent vacation. I pretty much spent 12/17 to 1/2 on a rollercoaster of anxiety. I'm sick and tired of this uncertainty and worry, so this a step toward getting myself together.

And I know what you mean about the unsettlingness of seeing a documentary or story about a celebrity with an illness! On a related note, is anyone else annoyed by these ads about cancers sometimes appear on this board :)

[remote1823]

Oh my gosh, yes!  Going to the doctor is the single most terrifying experience of my life.  The closest I've ever come to a true panic attack was sitting in the gastroenterologist's office a couple years ago.  I was nauseated, sweating and really thought I was going to pass out.  It's awful.  My blood pressure is through the roof every time I go. Last time the nurse had to get the little pulse ox thing for my finger to check my pulse because it was going so fast she couldn't count it! 

I'm in therapy now but I just started so I'm not sure how well it's going to work.  My therapist is really hopeful and assures me I can get over this.  I only wish I had a pill to take before a visit.  Really, I do.  I've always thought that would make it better but I've always been to afraid to ask my doctor for a prescription.  I'm afraid they'll just roll their eyes. 

[E.B]

This is something i deal with...awlful phobia with going to the doctors.

My only other post on here is asking if others are like me in being afraid of going to docs.

[Brody108]

I'm guilty as well, I often feel like everything is fine until you go to the doctor and he/she tells you you are sick. Even the way the nurses react with me can send me over the edge. Then when they do a test and tell you you have to wait a week to get results is the worst! Last time I told the nurse there is no way I can wait that long and they got my results in 2 days later.