I'm losing it....

[chase615]

I don't know what to do about this anymore....I have anxiety, I feel like I am completely detached from everything and everyone around me and there is absolutely nothing I can do about this.  Even worse is, I am a fully time student on winter break and I go back to school in 2 days...how am I supposed to deal with these issues AND deal with the demands of a fully time student work load??  Noone understands, I'm shaking constantly, I try to explain it but they just don't get it.  So I sit, alone...waiting for each day to pass so I can finally die and get this miserable existance over with.  The only time I feel half way ok is when I am laying here, not moving a muscle.

I hate this, I'm dizzy, my head throbs every time I move, I'm detached and noone gets it.  I literally am just waiting to die, because this existance sucks...someone please help.

[Stuckinside]

You're not alone friend. Many people like me suffer and have suffered through the exact same symptoms you are going through. Seek a Dr's help as soon as you can. Don't be afraid of taking medications, you're not crazy. Hang in there, bright spots will appear; this isn't the end of you. Seek companionship on this forum and advice from those here far more knowledgeable than me. I'm having one of the roughest days of my life right now but I'm not giving up hope. Don't you give in either. You can beat this.

[chase615]

Thank you for your advice.  I just don't understand why this has to happen to me.  I know I have such a bright future and so many things that I'm able to do and currently presueing but it all just seems so daunting and over whelming.  I come on these forums for answers but noone seems to have beat this for good, it just seems like it is "put off" for a little while...I wish there was a "cure".
I've taken meds in the past but they make me even more miserable, and I currently have meds on hand, but I am afraid of what might happen when I take them since I am going back to school.  Last time I took them, I was even worse....even more detached and didn't want to get out of bed.

I just want it all to go away...

[anxiousmedic]

i have felt that way before too... I was ok, I have my times now where things get rough but the good times will appear again. I am a student too and I feel your pain. Please don't give up the world it much to beautiful of a place to miss out.

[chase615]

You have any advice for getting over this?  I mean, it is literally constant.  It's not an attack, it lasts all day with maybe one or two 20 minute periods where i feel "ok"

Symptoms are, but i'm sure I will forget some:
Shaking
Afraid of the future
Dizziness
Constant headache
Severe Nausea
I feel detached
Very difficult to think, have a solid conversation that is effortless...
Not hungry
Back of my upper neck is absolutely killing me

what can i do to get rid of these symptoms??  I need to be able to function at school, and as is right now, I won't be able to do a damn thing...

[trend900]

Symptoms are, but i'm sure I will forget some:
Shaking
Afraid of the future
Dizziness
Constant headache
Severe Nausea
I feel detached
Very difficult to think, have a solid conversation that is effortless...
Not hungry
Back of my upper neck is absolutely killing me

that's me! 

I felt just like that. at the worst i was like that for about an entire month. The worst for me was that i didn't knew what has happening to me. I was afraid of getting a heart attack or something. I was afraid of passing out while driving. Each and every of those symptoms that you wrote... i got ALL of them. each and every one.

But hey! There IS a cure. That cure is yourself. You have to empower yourself, learn about it, learn how to control it. DONT RUN! EMBRACE your symptoms. there's LOTS and LOTS of information about it. That's what i did, and it worked. Do i get them from time to time, but now i know how to control it.

All those things that you feel are just anxiety. Nothing more. Dont fight against it... just let it flow and ask for more. Sounds crazy i know... but that's it.

Let me tell you a story: My girlfriend lives a bit far away from me (160km) i go to her house every saturday. Normally i was afraid to go there. i was always thinking "What if they see me sweating? what if i pass out? what if i start to shake? what if i want to go to the bathroom while we're on the street or something?" and guess what? my anxiety levels skyrocketed. But now, im empowered. I say to my body "If that's what you dont want me to do... that exactly what i will do!"

Now, i enjoy every saturday, and i see every panic attack as an oportunity to be even stronger.

Dont run... Embrace it and ask for more.

[chase615]

thank you a ton for that trend, and i will absolutely try and do what you are suggesting...I feel like I'm getting a little better at knowing what my triggers are since I started chatting with people in the chat room here.  My fear is that I will lose it and have noone there that knows what's going on with me and I will look like a complete nut job in the middle of a busy street, mall, market...etc  I'm trying to push through this, but this constant feeling of confusion and being out of it is what's really got me reeling.  The dizziness does't help at all either.  Thanks a ton though, i do appreciate it.


that's me! 

I felt just like that. at the worst i was like that for about an entire month. The worst for me was that i didn't knew what has happening to me. I was afraid of getting a heart attack or something. I was afraid of passing out while driving. Each and every of those symptoms that you wrote... i got ALL of them. each and every one.

But hey! There IS a cure. That cure is yourself. You have to empower yourself, learn about it, learn how to control it. DONT RUN! EMBRACE your symptoms. there's LOTS and LOTS of information about it. That's what i did, and it worked. Do i get them from time to time, but now i know how to control it.

All those things that you feel are just anxiety. Nothing more. Dont fight against it... just let it flow and ask for more. Sounds crazy i know... but that's it.

Let me tell you a story: My girlfriend lives a bit far away from me (160km) i go to her house every saturday. Normally i was afraid to go there. i was always thinking "What if they see me sweating? what if i pass out? what if i start to shake? what if i want to go to the bathroom while we're on the street or something?" and guess what? my anxiety levels skyrocketed. But now, im empowered. I say to my body "If that's what you dont want me to do... that exactly what i will do!"

Now, i enjoy every saturday, and i see every panic attack as an oportunity to be even stronger.

Dont run... Embrace it and ask for more.
[/quote]

[trend900]

People with Panic Disorder often fear that they will act in such a crazy, "out of control" manner that others will fear and loathe them, and avoid them thereafter.

However, there's usually very little about a panic attack that's visible. While you may feel like you're "out of control", you're probably still walking in an ordinary way toward the exit of the supermarket, or the theater, or wherever you happen to be.

In my experience, most people having a panic attack continue to act in an ordinary and amiable way, showing no particular sign of external distress, even as the panic rages within them. It's usually hard to tell when a person is having a panic attack. If they don't tell you, you probably won't notice.

This often causes conflict in the family, when loved ones say things like "You look okay to me", but this is why these fears of public displays typically don't come to pass. You may well feel embarrassed. You may feel sure that others are secretly laughing at you, or thinking that you're weird. You may worry that you will look, and act, so bizarrely as to be driven out of society and left to live with wolves. But this is another part of the Panic Trick.

source: http://www.anxietycoach.com/what-panic-attacks-can-do-to-you.html

Look at this:
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0P8f4ExY3vs" target="_blank">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0P8f4ExY3vs</a>

By the way: You DON'T need to pay for anything to control this. ALL is within your control. You only need to develop the right tools. Dont be fooled with scam websites!

[David Z]

Trend900 has the right idea. This method works, and I wish I had heard advice like this when my panic attacks were very severe. Moving toward and embracing panic, as counter-intuitive as that sounds, is actually the only real way to get over it.

[JKD]

Hi there,

Just wondered how you've got on these past couple of days?? I've had similar symptoms going back to work after the xmas break, please don't ever believe you're alone because nothing could be further from the truth! And yes, whilst there are lots of people on here who are still struggling with anxiety, many others have found coping mechanisms and begun to slowly work their way out of it - it's a slow process but don't be daunted, every episode is a chance to learn something new.  x

[Cara1989]

I feel the exact same way...I feel like im detatched from myself i feel like i have no control of my body sigh ive been trying so hard to keep my head up i look back to when i was normal and think how did i do that? =/

[JKD]

Sorry to hear you're still not feeling great.

I think part of the problem here might be your thinking about the past and describing it as "normal" and comparing it to the present, then projecting it into the future, further creating problems for you in the here and now as it makes you feel hopeless. This probably doesn't sound like news to you but believe me, there IS a way to manage all this over-thinking - ultimately you're experiencing all these horrible physical symptoms of anxiety and your mind is trying to get a grasp on it, to "solve" the problem, by comparing it to past events and trying to figure out how you got here and what to do in the future etc, but all this just perpetuates the problem (in fact you could argue it creates it). Can i suggest some books/cd's for you? (i know you have limited time being a student but they really will help)?

1) "Mindfulness: an Introduction to Finding peace in a frantic world" - Danny Penman (This book helps you to recognise anxiety as just a miscommunication between body & mind and guides you through practices to let go of the worries, fears and horrible thoughts attached to it)

2) "The Power of Now" - Eckhart Tolle (helps you to recognise the future and past as just projections of your mind and brings you back to the only moment that we ever really have, which is THIS one - this literally dissolves anxiety because you realise that the past is just a memory and the future hasn't been given to you yet - the only moment you ever have to take care of is right here, right now, whatever you're doing and wherever you are.)

3) Mindfulness for Beginners (CD) - Jon Kabat-Zinn (The first CD explains what Mindfulness is and brings comfort as it teaches you how to adopt a more compassionate and accepting approach towards yourself, the second CD guides you through meditation practices. I was dubious when this was first suggested to me as I thought it would be a generic "spiritual healing" guide or something but it has genuinely brought me complete peace in some of my darkest times, I still listen to it now and again to remind myself that I can regain control should my mind wander and keep going through the same old anxious thought spirals that used to bring me so much pain and distress.)

There are also some posts I think you would find helpful - in fact I would recommend you do this before anything else! I'm not sure how to attach them here but PLEASE read past posts by lapallyoga - this person genuinely understands anxiety and has managed to fully recover, I would recommend anyone who suffers from anxiety, depression or related issues reads his posts, he has managed to find a way to describe his recovery process in a very clear and concise way.

Please keep us updated, and know you are most definitely not alone. x

[JKD]

Apologies - the user's name is lapallyloga - I misspelt it above... x

[Freaked out]

I I feel the same! I'm always scared I'm having a heart attack an know one understands

[livelaughlove]

#1 you are not alone, more than half the world has your EXACT same problems and if they say they don;t than they are lying. I work in healthcare, i see it every day, and anxiety manifests itself in many different ways. It just feels wrong because it's considered taboo to talk about it or admit you have a problem. So being that you feel in such despair I think it is REALLY important you talk to a mental health professional right away. You want to stop this before your thoughts get the best of you and you spiral down in to a worse depression or start exhibiting agoraphobic tendencies which are hard to break. That's just my experience.
With me, when i get anxiety, i tend to get weird health problems, nausea, diarrhea, swollen lymph nodes, aches and pains, fatigue, headaches, i even get ocular migraines. I have fear of the unknown, and i think of What if scenarios such as what if i have a panic attack in public. What will everyone think, will they laugh at me, or just pass judgement and deem me crazy? The funny thing is that all this goes on in my head, but no one thinks anything is wrong, so i am really good at hiding it and pretending too be strong when inside i am dying. I am on my 12th day of zoloft 50 mg and these feelings are starting to go away, i still have them, but i can rationally think them out and stay more calm. I do have to say the first 2 weeks (but are getting better now) caused major increased anxiety and nausea really bad (i lost like 15 lbs) but it is working because i am getting my appetite back and feeling more calm. The only problem i have now is when i first wake up in the morning with a speeding pulse, but i know that will stop too. (this is my second time on zoloft).
Some things that help me, is breathing. When you feel an attack, inhale deeply through your nose. Imagine your lungs fully filling up with air. Hold it 5 seconds, then exhale through your mouth. Repeat for 5 or 10 minutes. Also, keep a worry journal. Write down your fears throughout the day and designate a 20 minute time period where you can sit down and reflect upon your fears. Each time you get a worry, just write it down, and say i am allowed to worry and have run-on thoughts but not until my designated time period. Also, it's important, even though you don't feel like it, to keep going out and remain active so you can prove to yourself you will be fine in public. Also, no caffeine, that speeds up your heart rate and can cause a panic attack. Hope this helps!

[cheeseflavoredpudding]

You literally described me! I have the SAME EXACT symptoms as you! I go to a therapist and work on EMDR as well as hypnotherapy for my symptoms. I was skeptical at first, i thought hypnosis was just mumbojumbo but it is all very scientific and has done wonders for me. Unfortunately, I am experiencing problems with my meds right now and the symptoms are back and ten times worse. You are so not alone, even when you feel that you are, know you are not. This too shall pass. We are in the same boat and school was really hard for me to go back to after break as well. i had to leave and go home "sick" because I was too anxious to stay. I take the days one class at a time and don't worry about the people noticing you shake. They have no idea what you go through so don't even give them the time of day. I really hope you get through this rough patch, just know that you have support.