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Author Topic: Judgement  (Read 544 times)

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Offline anxiousmedic

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Judgement
« on: December 30, 2012, 09:58:22 PM »
Whenever I am in social situations I feel that I am being judged and ranked on how I look. I am not the type of girl that comes out of your magazines and I have flaws.. I try to accept them but it is hard when I feel I constantly looked at.. this all encourages my want to seclude myself and hide
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Taking everyday one hour at a time living for the moment.

Offline Happy sailing

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Re: Judgement
« Reply #1 on: December 30, 2012, 11:37:24 PM »
It has been my experience that EVERYONE has insecurities.  Also, most people are often feeling insecure about themselves, more than thinking about someone else.  Also if someone "judges" someone else, it means they are insecure, and have some type of self-judgement as well, and it is a way of deflecting their own personal insecurities, to make themselves feel better.
Hope this helps!!
Hugs.  :happy0151:
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“Frame thy mind to mirth and merriment, which bars a thousand harms, and lengthens life”

Offline anxiousmedic

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Re: Judgement
« Reply #2 on: December 31, 2012, 08:56:39 PM »
Very True Thanks :happy0151:
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Taking everyday one hour at a time living for the moment.

Offline PinkIcePrincess

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Re: Judgement
« Reply #3 on: January 04, 2013, 08:33:18 PM »
Happy Sailing is sooooooooooooo right!!

Sadly society does judge on everything not only looks but weight,money,home,cars,who you hang with it is never ending .
  I am a people watcher I think because I wanna see if they are looking at me or making fun of me I think it does stem back to when I was younger and heavier,not pretty, and very poor so clothing was not cool and I did not fit into any groups or cliques but I am so happy I was never in a clique with mean girls or even guys.
  I became a better stronger person then the ones that made fun of me or judged me.
 Get out there and shine!! We are who we are and we gotta love ourselves and then the outside will look even better!!
 Take care!
 PinkIcePrincess
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Offline The Tourist

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Re: Judgement
« Reply #4 on: January 07, 2013, 09:14:44 AM »
I had more or less the same thoughts of people judging me based on my appearance. As a result, I would become quite anxious. So anxious that, just like you, I would begin to avoid social situations altogether. Big mistake. I felt even worse in my seclusion, wallowing in self-pity. And, of course, I just wanted to go out, meet and talk to people.

The solution? I don't know. We may have similar obstacles in life, but we still live in different circumstances. Personally, I just learned to shrug it off. People will be people. Everyone makes judgments of others to an extent. We're trying to identify others. It's what we do. Now if someone doesn't take kindly to me, then screw em. They can keep staring. I'm talking to someone else.
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Offline tinam7

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Re: Judgement
« Reply #5 on: January 08, 2013, 08:28:18 AM »
Fine posts. I come from an earlier time and can't believe how things have gotten worse in this area. I think it is the greater imagery all over the place, the ads of ridiculous perfection. People can't help but be affected adversely, it seems to me.

Tourist has the right attitude. Don't want to use bad language, but you can guess. The other part is to look at ourself in the mirror and say, "I'm fine as I am, like myself, feel good about myself."
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Offline Borisbmx

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Re: Judgement
« Reply #6 on: January 15, 2013, 03:58:10 PM »
 What i would do is  go to the gym.   Join a nice quality gym.   I do the incline treadmill for 60 minutes a few times a week and lift some weights.    Also i work on my nutrition,  adding stuff live salmon, potatoes, avacodes, millet,  while dropping processed grains and sugars.  I got good results  in the first year and i am now hooked on exercise.  Its a great confidence builder for me!
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Offline lcfrogs

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Re: Judgement
« Reply #7 on: January 16, 2013, 08:44:39 AM »
Most of my younger and older childhood was spent living in constant fear that people at school were judging me. I never spoke or acted out because I was afraid of being embarrassed and made fun of. As a result, I didn't have very many friends. In high school, I got into drinking and smoking weed and made friends that way (not healthy friendships). I was convinced that my best friends thought they were better than me because they were skinnier than me. I thought the reason I'd never had a boyfriend was because I wasn't skinny and pretty. I developed anorexia and bulimia because of my insecurities and as a way to cope with my anxiety and depression. By age 21, I had matured enough to realize that people really don't judge you constantly; they are more worried about themselves. But by that point in my life, my weight plummeted to 76 lbs and EVERYONE, even strangers, were staring at me and judging me. In high school, I thought I would like the attention for being skinny...but turns out I hated it. I am 26 now and doing much better. Most of the time I don't worry about what others think about me personality-wise, but I am still constantly comparing myself to others and worrying that when people see me they think I'm fat. I have days where I feel too fat and ugly to leave the house and do anything social. But it's really all in my head; I just have to keep telling myself that.
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