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Author Topic: A Burden To Others  (Read 371 times)

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Offline howifeel

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A Burden To Others
« on: December 04, 2012, 01:13:08 PM »
Being an individual with MDD diagnosis, my illness crops up from time to time the thought that i am a burden to others. This is my number one motivator for self harm resulting in death. It comes to the forefront at times, and, after a good six months, it is again pressing for attention. Being that I am a people pleaser by nature, and insist on others being okay, co dependencey is also a struggle. This encourages my anxiety, which leads to depression. Just checking in. My mind says, "Oh no! Here we go again! You'll never get through it this time. It should have never come back! Weren't you 'all better'?" Then it does the "That's it! Now you are going to lose everything! You are a burden to everyone, and no one can help." I considered stopping my AD because it seemed that things "resolved" over the past 6 months, but I think my AD is keeping me from a much worse episode, and back to the hospital. Just like a little over one year ago, this site has been a great help when I was in this place. Thank you to all of you.
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I do things to feel better, I don't wait to feel better to do things.

Online Cuchculan

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Re: A Burden To Others
« Reply #1 on: December 05, 2012, 10:31:28 AM »
So I take it that these episodes come and they go again. The fact that you can have good spells is what you should always look at. If you can beat something once, you can beat it a millions times over. We just have to believe in ourselves. Nobody has ever told you that you are a burden on them. That is the irrational mind thinking. I am sure these same people would love to see you well and would do anything to help you out. It is when we are down that we have to push hardest of all. There is always a road back. No matter how bad things may seem. People here on this forum are always here for you. They can relate to what you are going through. So keep posting. I am sure this phase will past. Just like it has done in the past. Remember, Never say Never.
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Offline howifeel

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Re: A Burden To Others
« Reply #2 on: December 05, 2012, 03:11:58 PM »
Thanks for the reply Cuchculan. It is true. No one has ever said that I was a burden. I'll have to remember that. I am getting better again. I can already feel it. Had no idea it would be this light. Usually, it a slow oncoming, unavoidable darkness that takes a while to pull out of with lots of effort. I think I got of easy on this one. Thanks again!
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I do things to feel better, I don't wait to feel better to do things.

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