my anxiety was a blessing in disuise

[cedeslane]

I saw an older post about this but no one has posted in a long time and i really wanted to talk about this
I do believe my anxiety turned out to be a blessing in disguise. 
A few months before my anxiety started to control my life i was doing drugs.
I had done crack, cocaine, meth, and quite a few different pain killers, along with anxiety medication like xanex and klonapin to get high.
I can say i enjoyed doing these. I remeber even feeling like i really needed them  for some reason whatever it may have been at the time. I also was around a few people that i was very very close to and they were also using, so to me it was okay to want to get high. I remember likeing the feeling from a few too much than i should have, i also did each of them multiple times, some more than others. But about 8 to 10 months after i had tried them for the first time and continued to do them. I started having panic attacks, at first and for awhile i didnt associate the drug to my anxiety but now having not done any since i was diagnosed with GAD, to get high that is i am now on anxiety medication, I have come to believe that if i hadn't started having my panic attacks i might have become an addict.
After i stopped using or rather around the time i stopped using my very best friends started using heroin, which i never tried, nd i first hand witnessed the drug ruin theyre lives and put them through the worst hell i have ever seen anyone go through. I lived with them i saw it every day. And it effected my life in the worst kind of way, i never even touch the drug and it had a tremendous affect of my life.

So looking back now i have to be thankful for that happeneing when it did, because there is no telling where i would be today if my anxiety hadn't peaked back then. Ans as crazy as it sound, believe me i know it sounds crazy but i am thankful for it now. I am still battling with my anxiety but i can still live my life more so than i believe i could if i had chosen that path.

It might be a contradiction because i am now on anxiety medication that is addictive but i dont take them to get high i even take a significantly lesser amount than i am perscribed. I just believe i am so much better off trrying to beat this than trying to battle addiction.

if your still with me thank you so much for reading and if anyone else has a story like this or comment i would realy love to hear them
God bless and i hope evryone has happy holidays 

shining some light on this life changing situation

[JustWant2bWell]

Idk what to say, but wasn't going to leave this topic empty.

It's great you rationalize that your anxiety was a blessing in disguise and it's great news that you no longer are a user.  Keep it up!

[floridaguy65]

Yes indeed....wonderful! Thanks for sharing:)

Anxiety issues and illicit drugs do not mix. This has been proven time and time again. ALL reasonings otherwise are merely shallow, false justifications.

I wish you all the best in your learning how to best help yourself with your mental health challenges. Anxiety does NOT have to define our lives. Eventually drugs DO end up defining our lives....it spirals out of control, ultimately....unless it is stopped. Congrats in your not doing illicit drugs....it will always be a must in your lifelong journey in living well alongside your anxiety issues. And, you CAN learn how to live so very well, in accord, with anxiety. Acceptance is NEVER resignation. You can always get better:)

Peace and Feel Well:)

[cedeslane]

Thank you both so much for your support and comments i appreciate them both very much :) this is the first time i have ever talked about my issues aloud with people, besides my fiance, and it really is great to know that there are people out there that will show some love and support even to a total stranger really makes me believe there is some good left in people :) thank you both very much

[PinkIcePrincess]

   Awesome !!
  I do believe when we are faced with issues in our lives they come for a reason and we are too learn from them and wow have you!!! AMAMZING READ!!
 
 CONGRATS AND KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK!!!  I am just so excited for you and so happy you overcame so much and you are right you could have been gone by now!! I lost my brother due to drinking,drugs and smoking this past year he had an accident that was related to his drinking.. so for me makes me so happy to see people like you overcome and work on getting getter and living a full life!!!
 Thanks so much for sharing!!
 God Bless and you will be in Prayers for your continued success!
 PinkIcePrincess!!

[cedeslane]

thank you so much i do appreciate the support :) and i am very sorry to hear about your brother i wish you and your family the best to get through these hard times and you will be in my prayers also. i have seen too many people go down because of drugs and things of that nature i know how hard it can for o many different reason.
Thank you for reading
God Bless <3