Scary thoughts, need advice.

[ToxicOne]

This is my first time posting, so bear with me. I was looking at a hentai topic on a diffrent forum about the start of this month. I was scrolling down the screen when I saw some loli hentai. I immediatly closed the page and did something else, to get my mind off of it. My problem is that the images won't leave my mind, no matter what I do. I completly abhor any kind of sexual content with underage participants and I'm afraid that I might end up as the very monster I hate. I don't want to be a pedo....

[ToxicOne]

I should also mention that I have obsessed about things before. I have within the past year thought I was going to die by Avian Flu, Mad Cow, in a nuclear conflict with Iran, and other things that work me up for a while, then die on their own. Could this be just another one of those attacks?

[Nikki_3]

the one thing i have always reminded myself of while having irrational or intrusive thoughts is these thoughts are fears, something you fear will happen, not wants or disires!!If you stress that your yourself it will help you realize that these thoughts are just that!, thoughts of the fears you have!, i also would recommend reading books like brain lock and stop obsessing, those 2 book help allot

[ocdengineer]

Nikki is exactly right and those two books will really put things in perspective for you.  I personally had the same problems with intrusive thoughts of violence, perverse acts, etc.  It all depended on the day, but I would then have panic attacks as a result of the horrible thoughts I was having.  The key to this one is to not allow the thoughts to cause you pain or fear.  This sometimes seems counterintuitive because the thoughts are hurtful and deep down people feel like they shouldn't be having these thoughts and in some way should be punished.  Trust me, everyone has intrusive thoughts, some have them and aren't aware, some have them and are aware (you and I), and some have them are aware and enjoy them (dangerous people).  You don't enjoy your thoughts of horrible acts and will find that the more you allow the thoughts to rule youthe worse they will become.  Definitely read those two books and consider CBT and mindfulness meditation.  I also take Xanax which helps a ton with the anxiety.  With the anxiety and panic gone I can really focus on not obsessing about the stupid thoughts that run through my head everyday.  If you don't have compulsions then you most likely suffer from Pure O which is described in both of the books you are going to read.

Good luck,
OE

[pippip]

I've worried about being a pedo too even though i'm not even 18 yet! Try and tell yourself that the fact that these thoughts are causing you distress and worry it shows that they disturb you and are not part of who you are.

[zydecohead]

Your not alone in this... several people with ocd have these types of thoughts and its...sounds wierd...but for ocd its quite normal... there is a wonderful book called "Imp of the Mind" check it out, you can get it on a kindle if you own one or order it....  Go to a psychiatrist that specializes in OCD and get on meds that help... lots of meds can completely elliviate the thoughts...  Dont give up, since you are afraid or distressed by your thoughts its normal... If you werent that would be different...  you will be ok, just get help and dont sit and let you chemical imbalance pushwho you really are inside around.